Sharp Pencils

ABBA is back

2011-07-09T12:26:00.006+01:00

Theatre by the Lake, BBC Radio 4 and BBC Writersroom are running this to help with the competition. Thought you might be interested.

Are you interested in writing for radio?

Would you like a £5,000 writing bursary and the chance of a Radio 4 drama commission?

On Thursday 14th July BBC Radio Drama North will launch their 2011 Alfred Bradley Bursary Award, an open submissions process which aims to find talented Northern based writers who are interested in writing for radio.

Charlotte Riches, Producer for BBC Radio Drama Development, and Jo Combes, New Writing Development Manager for BBC Writersroom, will be here at Theatre by the Lake at 6.30pm on Thursday 25th August to discuss what the judges will be looking for in submissions and how you can make your writing stand out from the rest. They will also be on hand to answer any questions about the award and about how you can get your first writing break at the BBC.

The award is run in partnership with the BBC Writersroom and full Award details, entry forms, terms and conditions and sample scripts are available on the Writersroom website from Friday 15th July. www.bbc.co.uk/writersroom/.

This event is free but places are limited – please contact the box office at Theatre by the Lake for tickets. 017687 74411

If you fancy a bit of light entertainment.

2010-12-20T18:23:00.002Z

I have a short play (about 5mins) on Radio Cumbia. It is one of a set of five with the theme Winter.

They will be broadcast each day starting Monday 20th December at about 930 with a repeat between 5 and 7pm and between 10pm and 1am. Mine is on Tuesday.

You can listen in from beyond Cumbria because the live broadcasts and replays (for a few days)are homed here. Catch them while you can.

Nanowrimo

2010-11-16T19:01:00.003Z

Just popped by to say I've got past 25,000 words at the end of the 15th day. Way hay.

Back to writing.

Oh and for those wondering what on earth I'm talking about look here.

A list of novels

2010-10-03T16:25:00.003+01:00

I spotted this in Piers blog and thought, well I have a bit of time. Little did I guess how long I would be searching my shelves for a book beginning with E or X. I remember plots but not titles.

So the idea is to list books for each letter of the alphabet. Only using the first one you think of and not the one you find later that is more impressive. And it must be one you have really read, not just one you keep on your coffee table to shock the vicar.

This is tougher than it looks. Epecially when you keep remembering ones and finding the letter is already used. There are a lot of books beginning with M and W on my shelves.

So here is my list. Like Piers I will not select a victim. Just read, enjoy and if you have a couple of hours to kill where you should really be writing or washing out the bin then have a go.

A: Animal Farm: George Orwell
B: The Big Sleep: Raymond Chandler
C The Chrysalids: John Wyndham
D: Dracula: Bram Stoker
E: Empire of the Sun: JG Ballard
F: Frankenstein: Mary Shelley
G: Greenwitch: Susan Cooper
H: The Hobbit: J.R.Tolkein
I: The Inheritors: William Golding
J: Judgement on Janus: Andre Norton
K: King Solomon's Mines: H Rider Hubbard
L: Labyrinth: Kate Mosse
M: The Midwitch Cuckoos: John Wyndham
N: The No.1 Ladies' Detective Agency: Alexander McCall Smith
O: The Osterman Weekend: Robert Ludlum
P: Pride and Prejudice: Jane Austen
Q: Queen of Sorcery: David Eddings
R: Revelation: C J Sansom
S: Swallows and Amazons: Arthur Ransome
T: A Town Like Alice: Neville Shute
U: Ubix: Philip K Dick
V: Virgin in the Ice: Ellis Peters
W: The Wierdstone of Brisingamen: Alan Garner
X: (Essential) X-men: Chris Claremont- Well I was struggling on this one.
Y: The Year of the Comet: John Christopher
Z: Zanthan at Moon's Madness: R M Williams

Bumblebee Mode

2010-08-29T22:23:00.002+01:00

OK. As Piers noted my two week break turned into a year. Lots of things were happening and juggling them all isn't easy when you can't even throw a ball properly.
Really, I can't. I was fielding in rounders recently, well you can sit and pick the daisies if you deep field can't you, and I caught the ball. Don't ask me how, because if I'd tried I'd have missed it. I must have been distracted by the pretty daisy chain, spread my hands in admiration at how well I'd constructed it when the ball plonked down into my palm.
Anyway everyone was shouting at me to throw it and my aim is so bad I worried I'd hit someone because rounders balls are hard and so the only place I could see with no people in it was the space above my head so I filled it. With the ball. Then realised there's gravity isn't there and heavy ball plus gravity moves much faster than fielder plus large drag area so I made like a cartoon and said Doh.
Back to the story. So some things had to be dropped for a while. I did lurk around the blogs when I could. Just to check you were all OK. You are all OK aren't you? All producing masterpieces and getting them commissioned?
Not that I really dropped writing I supposed. I just went into bumble bee mode. Flitting from project to project and finishing nothing. It was such a relief to discover from the local scriptwriting group that they'd all gone through it and it does pass.
Well it has and I'm back writing properly again. Can't promise to post regularly though. I'll see how it goes. And what have I managed to write over the past year?
A short radio script for a local competition that didn't get picked. It was a spooky one that required some tricky sound effects. Local radio doesn't have the budget or facilities for a Foley library so it was a bit dumb of me to write it like that I suppose. I did get feedback that it might have success if it was a longer psychological piece to submit to writersroom instead. So that's one that needs a bit more work.
A half hour, one act stage play. This was a collaboration between the local scriptwriting group and a local theatre company. The theatre company will pick three of the scripts to make up a full play, each act being a different story with the same setting and cast.
Writing for this one clashed with Red Planet Comp and I couldn't manage to do both well so I picked the play instead. I took the opportunity to experiment with this one and I'll talk more about the challenges it threw at me once they've made the selection. If it isn't picked then I plan to expand the play into a longer piece. Waste not want not.
Right now I'm finishing a radio play that I began two years ago for ABBA 2009. It was dropped so I could concentrate on my other entry and I've finally got back to finishing this one off. Or rather I've taken the concept and am re-writing from the beginning again. Looking at something after a long break really does help.
I hear my keyboard calling so must go for now. Keep writing.

Incommunicado for a Fortnight

2009-08-14T18:50:00.002+01:00

To meditate and ruminate and cogitate and percolate and basically have a good rest.

See you in a fortnight.

The name's the thing.

2009-08-02T17:29:00.017+01:00

Discovering Axel Rose's real name was Bill Bailey made me wonder what I would have chosen as a Rock name. Wanting something that would make me cool I hunted around for inspiration and came up with...nothing. I can't do cool. Not even slightly tepid.

However the internet claimed it could do better. Just type in your first name here and whether you're male of female then away it goes. So details went in and it came up with...Ellyn Sixx. What? A rock star called Ellyn? I could believe the lack of spelling ability but purlease. Even the website reckons I am a chill free zone. It gives me the name of an android or a murder victim. Great.

But there was hope. Maybe I could be a street-wise, angst ridden rapper. Hold on. Do they do angst-ridden or is it just a revamp of "You think you've got it hard kid? In my day we had to use go-carts for driveby shootings." So I put my info in again and I got Femme Rose. Cheers. Now I'm a ribbon wrapped, glitter covered perfume bottle. More glam rock than rapper. Think I'll bin this internet search.

I do have a big problem with names. Tell me yours and guaranteed it will go in one ear and out the other. Not because I mean to be rude but my brain holds that kind of information like a herring net holds a midge.

I've stated vociferously (now there's a lovely word) to phonecallers at the office that Methuselah Bates* does not and has never worked here until Methuselah taps me on the shoulder. Is it my fault I've know him as boy* for past ten years?

The problem doesn't stop there. I have to think of names for my characters. I call them A, B and C for as long as I can but eventually it gets awkward. And names are important as Daniel Gritten guest posted on Danny Stack's site in his write up of the William Ackers talk.

It would be nice to say I can just pull names out of the air but every time I try I just get two syllable names that end in eeeee. Like a register being read out at a chav convention.

So instead I try to find names that mean who they are. I have a couple of baby name books and I hit the internet again. Once I've applied my rule that no two names should have the same first letter I end up with a very short list. Too short. So off I go again for another dig. I can send a few evenings doing this.

I wish I could put aside the suspicion that it is all just another form of procrastination. Maybe I should go down the Prisoner route and bin the names all together.

So how do you handle naming?

* Name changed so he won't thump me.

Enter Late - Leave Early

2009-07-20T20:49:00.001+01:00

Err-Humm. Excuse me? Anybody there? No? Woo hoo. Party time.

So what am I going to talk about today? There seems to have been a lot of flux in the blogs recently. Some have died and will be sorely missed. Some have revamped and others are still considering what they are doing and why they are doing it. Hmmm.

So should I write something deep and meaningful? Something enlightening fellow readers and directing them to fame and fortune?

Problem is I'm no expert in writing so it would be blind leading the blind, everyone holding onto the one ahead, marching in circles to nowhere. And there are lots of people with oodles of knowledge to guide you already. See the list of blogs to the right for a start.

Should I write about my latest projects? Not much to say on that front because I've been in a bit of gloom and they haven't progressed. Need to get them sorted, I know.

So I was lying there last night, listening to the Tropical Rainforest. It's a recording sadly, not some exotic holiday. One day…Anyway I thought maybe I could write about this thing "Enter late - Leave early". Again Hmmmm.

I've worked hard on this one and have chopped off beginnings and ends until it feels my scripts race along so fast that the viewer will be gasping for breathe before Act 2. But I do wonder why we do it.

Yes it keeps the pace up. Yes it makes the writing concise. Yes it gives you those precious turning points fast…faster… fastest. But why the rush?

Is it a Hollywood thing? Race in, snatch the prize, race out. Rush here, rush there. No time to waste. I want it all and I want it now…now… now. Is this low attention span real or is it just that someone somewhere decided they couldn't sit still more than 5minutes and conned everyone else that it was normal?

At first I thought, definitely. It's an American thing. You won't see it in Europe. But looking along my DVD shelves I don't think that's really true. You can't call Nikita or les Visiteurs slow paced. Nor do Lost in Translation or Sideways go at a break neck gallop.

So is it genre? Action should be fast paced and drama maybe slower? I looked for a slow paced action, never scared of a challenge, and I found Three Days of the Condor. It has its fast bits but most of it is slow and steady. I then looked for a fast paced drama and found le Diner de Cons. I defy anyone to call that slow paced. I count it as drama but I know someone out there will be screaming "Thriller and Farce." My blog. I win.

Maybe it's tied to budget? A higher budget demands a faster pace or the audience won't turn up and they won't get their money back. Only if that was true then how could a low budget film slip in and swipe the audience?

I think it is all a big conspiracy. Probably by the twitter creators. Get them used to short, sharp shocks and they'll be easy prey to twit …. Ahh used up the character limit. For heaven's sake where does 140 come from? Too long for a putdown and too short for a decent conversation. I want a discussion, not a sentence. Am I becoming a luddite in my old age?

Is the art of conversation dead? Will a film get a decent budget without insisting we are too thick to concentrate longer than 3 minutes? Will Jessica ever persuade Benson to serve poptarts?

So where have all these ramblings taken us? Nowhere really. But here's the thing. Didn't you enjoy the stroll through thoughts and musings? Wasn't the journey more interesting than the destination? Didn't you find starting early and leaving late a refreshing change? Wasn't the distraction more entertaining than sharpening pencils?

No? Who said that? Well if you are frustrated at wasting a few seconds of time on scenery and wish you'd stuck with charging after the holy grail then as the caramel bunny would say "Just take it easy."

CBBC and Birdlife

2009-06-14T15:52:00.004+01:00

I've spent the past week working on my CBBC entry. Not the episode itself but what I want the series to be. It has taken a while because I kept finding flaws and having to go back and rethink. I've found kids are very good at finding holes in plots and very vocal when a character does something clearly stupid.

Kids don't go into dark basements when there's a killer about. After all they know there is nothing a killer likes more than a dark basement. Or under the bed or in the wardrobe or anywhere but in the nice, bright warm parts of the house.

No I'm not writing a serial killer series. somehow I don't think that would go down too well with parents of 6-12yrs old even though I suspect the kids would love a nice bit of murderous mayhem. I once made a dinosaur birthday cake for a party. Asked the kids which bit I should cut off first and they gleefully screamed "The head".

Anyway I am writing a scary piece but I'm trying to be careful with the balance. Not so scary that they have nightmares. That's more a Saturday Teatime thing. However scary enough that they have to watch to see that all ends well.

I've also made sure the kids get themselves out of trouble rather than being the victims and that each major scare gets sorted at the end of the episode but there is still enough menace left that they want to tune in again to see how it develops.

I may have got the balance all wrong but I'm sure someone will enlighten me when they read it. I loved scary stuff as a kid, as do all the kids I know but it is adults that do the selecting.

On the summer front, we have hung up a load of feeders outside our living room window. It has been an eye opener. Anyone tells you collar doves are sweet should see what they've done to my heather. Flattened it. And wood pigeons can "deposit" more than chickens. Clearly these are the graffiti artists and vandals of the birdworld.

Starlings are complete psycho bullies that chase all the other birds away then swing on the feeders until the contents are sprayed all over the floor while blackbirds grab chunks of fat balls as they fly by, spit them out then dive down to eat them. Yuck. What slobs.

House sparrows have oversized kids that sit on the feeder, right next to the seeds but scream for the parents to pick them up and shove them in their great big gobs. The chavs of the birdworld? Then there are the great tits, coal tits and bluetits that swing upside down to eat, just cos they can. Big showoffs. OK. Little show offs. The rockers of the fraternity.

The poor robins hardly get a look in. Or rather they are too cool to get involved and sit on the wall until the brawling is over then glide in and and pick the choice pieces the others are too raucous to notice. And the finches dive in when all is quiet and then scoot off again when others turn up. The shy wallflowers.

Poor Henry, our cat, is failing to live with the shame. All these feathered tasties and the one time he caught one he got told off. He sits on the wall, glaring at passing dogs "You lookin' at me?". The result is a canine yelp and the screech of owners being dragged into the distance. He's hard, our cat.

I seem to have rambled on a bit today. Enjoy the sun.

A Good Tidy Up

2009-06-07T19:22:00.002+01:00

I've been doing a sort out of my writing area over the past couple of days. In my fantasy that means gliding into a fancy office with twirly chair and rosewood desk. Calmly sorting out the neat folders and pigeon holes and updated my tidy corkboard. In reality it involves pulling my battered laptop out of the detritus down my side of the sofa and opening up my "writing" folder. Somehow not as glamorous.

Anyway I found this tidy up rather therapeutic. I'd been feeling recently that I'd been in butterfly mode. Flitting one project to another and not finishing anything off. Doing a good sort out and compiling a list of projects for my portfolio revealed I'd done much more than I thought. I even found a couple of things I'd finished a few years ago and forgotten about. What other wonders might lurk in the mountains of cardboard boxes in the spare room?

There are a few projects at 1st draft only and a few more with step outlines completed but not written yet. However the majority were in a decent state and it surprised me how much Radio and Stage stuff I had. If you'd asked me I would have thought I had more TV and Film.

So now my head and folder have had a good clearout I should be able to plan my workload a bit better. This currently means working on my idea for the CBBC shout. I don't remember the last time they did a call for any writers so don't let it pass if you can help it.

And I've spent some of today listening to Tom Lehrner. Bought a couple of his CDs yesterday and now getting flashbacks to my student days when my decrepid flat would ring with "Poisoning Pigeons..." and "...she did everyone of them in." I don't know what they neighbours thought.

Hope you still have some Sun lurking about. Ours is just squeezing through a gap in the clouds and hoping they don't notice.

Calling Cumbrian sCribes

2009-05-29T22:37:00.004+01:00

I don't know how many Cumbrians read this. If you do then Hiya. Anyway there are a couple of competitions coming up that you might be a wee bit interested in. Sorry folks but they are Cumbrian only. Makes a change from "anyone can apply but you'll be expected to move down to London" things. Move to London? But it's flat and has this unhealthy sun stuff and...well...Southerners.

So for those in the Northern climes we have the Theatre of the Lake 10th anniversary this year. This coincides with the 10th anniversary of the writing group I recently joined, North Cumbria Scriptwriters. As a result there are a couple of comps you can go for.

10 Plays for 10 Years. This is being run by the writing group and you can follow the link for more details. A chance to get your work on Radio Cumbria. The deadline is 25th August 2009 so plenty of time to work on a 5min radio play.

And on a shorter timescale there is this. CAN YOU WRITE … AND ARE YOU FUNNY?
WRITERS WANTED FOR THEATRE BY THE LAKE

If you are a writer living in Cumbria, and have a well-developed sense of humour which you can translate into the written word, then here’s a great opportunity to get exposure for your work at the county’s only producing theatre – Theatre by the Lake in Keswick.

As part of the theatre’s 10th anniversary celebrations, Associate Director Stefan Escreet is planning a series of free lunchtime readings the Circle Bar at the end of August – of comic material. The intention is to have 2 different 30 minute shows, each of which will involve 3-4 actors from the resident professional company.

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW:
Each reading/performance and very short: say, a maximum of 10 minutes but really best to aim at 5 minutes. It also of course needs to be family-friendly, as it’s well before the 9 o’clock watershed and undoubtedly there’ll be kids around!

There’s no theme - just let your imagination run riot – and the readings can be stories or poems (including extracts from longer pieces), but MUST be original work, new material and FUNNY! Think irony, satire, stand-up, farce or subtle … but not short plays.

All work will of course be credited.

Entries should be typed on single sided sheets of A4, double line spaced and either sent as a Word email attachment (preferred) or as hard copies by post, in the first instance to:

Sue Allan sue.allan@edenarts.co.uk
Eden Arts
1 Sandgate
Penrith
CA11 7TP
DEADLINE: 12 JUNE

Stefan Escreet will select pieces for use during July and successful writers will be notified and kept in touch with the date(s) of readings of their pieces.

Useful Links

2009-05-10T22:14:00.003+01:00

I've been trawling through my bookmarks and thought I'd add some useful ones to the bar at the side. I may get organised enough to sort them into categories one day but at the moment they are just in alphabetical order.

Hope you find something useful there and please let me know if any of the links don't work.

ABBA and my Waterloo

2009-05-07T21:10:00.005+01:00

Well the ABBA results are in, for those of us not on the shortlist. I've been amazed how many daily hits I've had from people looking for the results. It has been going on for weeks.

I found out a little while ago that I hadn't got onto the longlist. Rats, rats, rats. It was hard not to put this news up earlier but I felt I should wait until the formal results were out. I've had my cry and I'm all better now. I did consider recording the play myself and putting it online anyway but the script involves specific lyrics so sorting out copyright would be a nightmare.

A couple in the writing group got onto the longlist so a big well done to them. Did any of you get through?

Working on another play (a short one) for the writing group's 10th anniversary. Got some feedback so onto my next re-write. For those living in Cumbria I will soon be posting about a related competition for you to enter.

And a big Good Luck to all those submitting to the BBC writing colleges.

Starting Science Fiction

2009-04-19T22:53:00.004+01:00

For some reason I haven't got much writing done this week. Maybe it was returning to work and being on frantic catch-up or still adjusting to the clocks changing. Whatever it was, this post is my most creative activity this week.

So what am I going to write about while my cat tries to push the laptop off and repeatedly turns the Caps on. The little @@%%$$. Well how about where my love for Science Fiction came from.

When I was out playing there were a handful of things that could drag me in. One was to watch an Apollo launch or landing. Not fiction I know, unless you believe those stories of secret filming in the desert. No I don't, I have a life. I would sit in front of the black and white TV with my Mum while she explained what was going on.

Another was Captain Scarlet. Forget Stingray or Thunderbird, that old Captain was cool and I still do Mysteron impersonations if I get my hands on a few torches. Each week I sat there, eager to see how he would escape those impossible, guaranteed death situations. OK. I was young, alright? My faith that he was in real danger each week was as indestructable as he was. And then there was Captain Black. I'm sure Darth Vader was based on him. I watched the remakes too but they just weren't the same. No strings for a start.

Dr Who has been part of life since, well my life started. The sofa was kept away from the wall just for Saturday night where we junior members of the family would hide. Peeking around to find out what the screams were about then diving back with horror. Nobody in the family would dream of missing it, right up until they cancelled the show. I was horrified when I heard it was to be reworked. How could they touch it? It was sacred?

Dave read all the advanced info because I couldn't bear to look then kept telling me it would be fine but I insisted the kids watched some of the originals before they saw the new stuff. Thankfully my fears were over nothing and it is now as regular a family event as the old stuff was. I think the highlight was the Daleks moving from their ships to the Satellite 5. I saw the trailer and screamed. "Oh my God they %%&& fly in space." I don't swear as a rule but well, that one deserved it.

I can remember watching the first trailers for Star Trek and wondering what on earth it was. I'd never seen anything like it. Again I was hooked. The gang of kids I played with were all fans too but when we built our own spaceship (a tree that had a convenient wall round it) I was always Captain Kirk. Can't remember if it was because I knew the most, because we'd picked up on the filtered down equality stuff or just no-one dared to demote me.

And Dad would make sure I watched any old movies that were on. Quatermass, Day of the Triffids, The Day the Earth Stood Still, War of the Worlds. Of course I was already in when they came on. The Mother Police on the estate would soon be whispering if any Mum was so slack as to let their child out after dark.

I would also run in to watch Marine Boy but the less said about that the better. Just pretend you never read that bit, OK?

But... you cry... that's all TV and Film. Well I did move onto books and devoured them but even an advanced reader takes a while before they can handle Azimov and Heinlein. Let alone Philip K Dick and Harlan Ellison. So my love of SF started with TV.

Don't know if this post counts as creative now I've done it so lets just call it a stream of conciousness. Have a great week.

End of Easter

2009-04-13T21:34:00.003+01:00

Well the week off is over, I'm munched buckets of chocolate and now its back to the day job tomorrow. Sob. Hope all you bunnies had a good Easter.

I didn't forget my writing this week.

My black comedy feature "Blood, Sweat and Tears" is now renamed "Shepherd's Ruin". Feels a more appropriate title with the major changes I've made to the story. I've done about 30% of the re-write on it.

I've started on the first draft of "Rain On My Parade" my comedy drama feature. This is about 10% done.

I even started on "Life to the Full", my drama feature. This has been blocked out for quite a while but I've now got down to writing the first draft.

Forgot to say I also submitted my synopsis of my horror feature, "Valley of the Moon Dancers", into the Euroscript Competition. A while until I hear.

I wrote a short radio play. This is a spooky one. And I've been playing with ideas for my young adult novel.

Sounds a lot but what I've actually been doing is jumping from one project to the next whenever I get stuck. I do wonder whether it would be better to plough on with just a single project but I hate to do one thing at a time.

Even when I watch TV I have to be knitting or reading or writing or tapestry or anything. It's what I find hardest with long haul flights. You can't take knitting needles or sewing on the flight in case you attack the crew with a lethal purl stitch. The curse of multi-tasking.

So how is everyone's workload doing?

Inspiration

2009-04-05T17:43:00.004+01:00

Well it's time for my weekly post and I sat here wondering what to say. I haven't done much writing this week. Very naughty I know but blame it on the bugs that are lurking around this Spring. It is Spring isn't it? I know it's sunny outside at the moment but they are forcasting torrential rain for my week off. Typical.

Anyway, back on topic. How do I get inspiration for my stories. When I sat down and thought about it I came up with the list below but to be honest I rarely make a concious decision to go somewhere and look for a story. It's usually hindsight that shows where it came from. But when I get stuck I know the list below will help me out.

1) Music. This is top of my list because it is my main source of ideas. I listen to a piece of music and pictures appear in my head. I then take these images and expand on them. It doesn't really matter what type of music, and I have catholic tastes. But it does need to generate an emotional response.

So forget elevator music and most pop. Classics, soul, blues, alternative rock are much better. But not under any circumstances Country and Western. I'm sorry but its going to be many decades and several lobotomies before I can handle that. Not that I'm anti-country, just I want a wrist-slashing ballard that comes from deep angst, not cos Pa sold the prize bull and now the cows are in Moo...rning.

2) Dreams. I used to get a lot of nightmares as a kid, immersion heater daleks and shopwindow dummies springing to life. So my Mum taught me to control my dreams. Of course we didn't know there was a fancy name for it. I can recall my dreams very clearly and go back into them when I want which makes a great place to play with ideas.

I find this is most useful at the beginning and end of a project. At the start I can play with ways of telling the story. At the end I can act out scenes and get the dialogue and emotions right. I have to keep a torch and notepad by the bed though to write ideas down or I'll never get any sleep.

3) Travel. I have to do this a lot and I can't say I enjoy it. Airports and hotels get to look very much the same after a while. What keeps me sane is people watching. Catching a snapshot of their lives and filling in the blanks. Why is that woman trying to handle a business deal on the phone while feeding her toddler processed gunk from a jar? What made that security man think shouting in English would make anything clearer to the Indian lady that can't speak a word of it? How did they all get into those situations?

4) Morning Papers. One writing course I attended started with a couple of days improvisation. My first response was...oh dear. I'd once been dragged to a drama school class by a mate and after one session of being a tree and walking round a room saying Cro...Co...Dile and Al...ig...at...or I swore never again.

But instead of walking I decided to give it a try and discovered it was great fun. And suprisingly hard too. Learning to hold the emotion in until it just has to burst out. To let others control what you do and say. It helped a lot with how people really talk and status games as well as stopping you editing your ideas too early.

The improvisation part was run by Dylan Emery of Grand Theft Impro and I believe they run courses in London so it would be worth checking them out here. Don't worry about making a fool of yourself. You won't be on your own. And the things people say when they are under pressure and have no time to think it through first. Hmmm Freud would have a field day.

Anyway, when I get really stuck I use the Morning Papers excercise. Just let yourself write anything until the flow is underway. You can always bin the early stuff.

5) Real Papers. Especially old ones used for packing. I like to think of it as recycling. I have a pile from the late 60s and early 70s that my Dad collected. Some are local papers and these I find are even better than the nationals. They have more of the wierd stuff. Odd adverts and little stories that were important to the community. Small scale stuff but that's what I like.

6) Brainstorming. I've had a few sessions with groups, coming up with a communal idea and it is great fun as long as everyone is prepared to have their ideas binned occasionally. It is awful if you have one individual plowing ahead with their idea and you are all expected to tag along. When it is working well the ideas seem to flow faster and you can bounce off each other. Not literally but I suppose that could be useful if you are working on an action film?

I have tried groups where everyone is in one room and I found these the easiest. Long distance groups tended to be a lot slower, even when emailing back and forth live. Sometimes you just need to see the whites of their eyes. However both forms were fun when you were working with people you trust. Haven't tried it with strangers.

So that's were I get my inspiration. What have you found works for you?

A Post Of No Importance

2009-03-28T16:00:00.004Z

1) Put the link of the person who tagged you on your blog. Lianne waited until I was away and then tagged me. I'm going to have to stop all this travelling or who knows what will happen next time I'm away.
2) Write the rules. Please read paragraph above and a few below. Done that? OK Job done.
3) Mention 6 things or habits of no real importance about you. Talk about myself? Hmmm. I wouldn't know where to start. Still, if you insist...
4) Tag 6 persons adding their links directly. Ermmm. Well there's...nope they've been tagged. Right I can do....again someone got there first. I tag Dave, Robin, Colin (if you're still out there), Jon (also a bit quiet), Paul (super quiet) and none blogger Caroline. (Aha. You thought you could escape. Nope. There's still the comments section girl.)
5) Alert the persons that you tagged them. Are you reading this? Good. Then consider yourself tagged. Ha.

So here's my little list.

1 I can make my knees bend backwards. It does tend to make people go yuck followed by retching noises so it is a habit I've worked hard to break. But it is so comfy when you have to stand for ages.

2 I've eaten raw meat. Yes I'm a vegetarian but that happened in my late teens. Before that I was known to partake of animal cadavers occasionally. Mum bought a packet of what she thought was luncheon meat and made our school sandwiches with it. Sadly it was a slab of raw pork. Tasted kind of chewy and sickly sweet. Like you'd imagine the rotting contents of a bin to taste. Just remembering it makes me feel a bit...OK, excuse me. Got to go throw up again.

3 I was called Cannonball when I played hockey. Maybe because my technique relied completely on momentum. Once I was racing down the pitch, anyone who got in my way would make a beautiful trajectory into the distance. And I wasn't averse to hooking my stick around ankles.

4 Every room in my house has piles of books in it. And I mean every room. Last time we moved the removal company had to get a second van because they had considered all the furniture and ignored my comments of : there are books inside there; have you spotted the piles of books?;and under those books there's...well...books. (Yes I know ?; is not a valid punctuation combination but I'm being creative and anyway it's my list.) Lots of moans about not being told it was a bleeding library and did we really read them.

5 I won a limerick competition when I was 10. The judge said it was because I entered more limericks than the rest put together. Well it was a class competition and any limerick that was obscene was binned. In the school I went to that meant nearly every entry got binned. But I was a good girl so I won. And the judge was a real poet too. Little did I know that early success would be followed by years of failure.

6 I want to travel up the Amazon before I die. But first I have to invent the perfect spider detterent. I can handle all sorts of creepy crawlies and actually like snakes and lizards but those 8-legged beasties. I even have to watch Arachnaphobia with my feet off the floor and a cushion to hide behind. And in our old house you get some big, hairy meanies. The sort that bounce back like a facehugger when Dave chucks them out. That carry their own suitcase in when they arrive. That knock plaster off the ceiling when they have their wild parties in the attic. Ever told a weightlifting, steroid enhanced spider to turn the music down? They just give you that unblinking, multi-eyed glare and you find yourself wearing slippers in Tescos at 3am looking for earplugs.

So that's my list done. Hope you enjoyed the read.

Still Busy

2009-03-17T23:06:00.003Z

Tum, te-tum, te-tum. Now where was I? Oh yes.

I got my 7on7 submission sent off but it didn't get picked. Rats.

I reached the end of my sitcom first episode but realised it was just too early in its development to sent out so I didn't enter Northern Laughs.

Instead I sent my Red Planet piece The Gate out to my faithful PO3s for them to rip to pieces. Seems they like the dark tone, the gory bits and the strong female characters. And I manage it without big guns and clingy T-shirts.

Lots of useful points too on pace problems and each character having its own voice. Also that Landrover winches don't work that fast. Rats. Got to think of another way to make a fast exit. Note to self. Do not rely on John Carpenter vampire films for reference.

I've also knuckled down to my page 1 rewrite of Blood, Sweat and Tears. I have the step outline done so in theory it is just a case or writing what I see in my head.

Ha. How naive is she? Yep I can hear you all thinking it. I'm a Mother. We can read minds.

And of course I am holding my breathe to hear who gets shortlisted for Alfred Bradley but that's the end of April so I may go a bit blue in the meantime.

Back to the keyboard.

Battling Dragons

2009-03-01T19:39:00.002Z

I feel like I've had a good week writing-wise. Well sort of.

The night before the deadline I decided to have a go at the 7on7 shout. They wanted three topical sketches or two topical with one character.

I had a character sketch already so I ran over it once more then read through the BBC News to see if anything inspired me. Must have been a productive day because I came up with several ideas, two reaching a point I was happy to submit. I read them out to Dave who didn't groan or throw rotten tomatoes so off they went.

I then carried on with my sitcom idea. Can't say it ran smoothly. I have a problem you see. When I try to be funny it is just...duff. When I just write it then things are a lot better. So I should be just plowing ahead but I keep going back on each scene and judging it.

Bad, bad idea. Of course it is a first, rough draft so it isn't going to be funny yet. I'm getting the story sorted first. But I keep losing heart and comparing to all my favourite writers.

So I am currently banning myself from reading back over anything until I get to the end. So what if the characters aren't consistent or the dialogue is on the nose. Just get it done you wassock. It's got me half way through and the plot structure is behaving so maybe it isn't such a stupid thing to do.

Well I've got to get back to battling dragons. Have a productive week.

One gone and more to go.

2009-02-21T21:13:00.003Z

Well the read through of "Don't be Koi" highlighted several passages that sounded great in my head but were a complete nightmare to say. So some work was needed there.

Feedback had also said some passages had the same monotonous rhythm. This was reinforced when they were read aloud so I did a bit of restructuring. The most effective way of doing this was to cut out some chunks and merge others so the process made the script tighter. Always a good thing.

So it went into the post today for the Alfred Bradley Bursary and I need to just forget about it and concentrate on the next project.

I've spent the past few days knocking ideas about for a sitcom. Northern Laughs deadline is coming up and I thought I'd spend a while seeing if anything came together. So I now have a small group of characters who bounce off each other well. There's plenty of opportunity to play with class and status and I can see how each relates to the others.

I've aimed for each to have a family role, even though only two are actually related. So I have a Father, Mother, Daughter, Uncle and Grandad role covered. Mixing the sex and age of the characters for these roles has been quite fun.

I also found a location for them. Two main rooms and one smaller one. I've made sure the characters have to stay in close proximity and the main character is trapped there, wanting to escape. A nice pressure cooker set up. All I have to do now is turn up the heat.

I do enjoy writing for characters that are unstable. I just give them a push and watch what happens. I must remember to be more cruel though. Got that as feedback a couple of times on other pieces. I don't make my characters suffer enough. Well I think this time I should get out the blowtorch and the birdysong cd**.

Lots of writing still to do though and the deadline is frighteningly close.

** I DO NOT and NEVER HAVE owned that item!!!!

Don't be Koi Part 2

2009-02-15T21:28:00.002Z

All the feedback has been read and acted on and I have done a re-write. Though it didn't seem to need a page 1 one. Thanks to non-bloggers Paul, Wendy, Caroline and Fran. Also thanks to bloggers Elinor and Dave. Yes my PO3 turned into a PO6.

All the advice was helpful and it's shocking how many spelling mistakes Word misses. Not me. It was Word. Honest. Oh and we won't talk about the protagonist changing name half way through. Didn't happen. Just a bad dream. I can't believe I did that!!!! Bottom line, as I tell my trainees: You can't check your own work. You just repeat your mistakes.

I've now got to do a read-aloud of the whole thing. Dave's going to have to dredge up his old acting skills to help me with that one. Then I'll put it aside for a while and read through just before I post it off.

Moving onto a sitcom idea ready for Northern Laughs. Just to see if it comes together in a civilised manner. Or maybe an uncivilised manner seeing as it is comedy. If I don't think it will be ready in time then I just won't enter.

Lots of other stuff to do. And do you find certain keys become faded? Mine are E, R, T H and N. There's no letter on them anymore. Just as well I can touch type. But it does make me wonder what I've been typing in my sleep. THERN? NERTH? Sounds like fantasy characters to me. So I've just got to find where it's hidden on my drive, this nocturnal novel.

Don't be Koi

2009-02-06T23:39:00.002Z

My first page re-write is done and it is now out to PO3. Wooo Hooo (with a good Blur rhythm). I think that deserves a nice hot chocolate. With squirty cream on top. Oh and the script is now a black comedy instead of a romcom. I couldn't help it. It just got darker and darker. Must be the time of the year.

Hope all your entries are going well.

Writing Progress Report

2009-02-04T18:28:00.008Z

At the beginning of Winter I listed my plans for the chilly months here. I thought I'd give an update on progress. Yes I know there are those fancy sliding progress things but I've not mastered them yet.

The Gate: Horror TV series: The first 10 pages were submitted to Red Planet but didn't get picked. I re-wrote them and completed the first draft of the episode. This involved binning some scenes I really liked but they slowed the pace and had to go. Interestingly I found the supporting characters more fun to write than the protagonist. I don't know if that is typical? The script is now in the feedback loop starting with hubby who likes to track down holes and switches in character. It will head out to PO3 after that.

Don't be Koi: Romcom Radio Play: This is my Alfred Bradley entry. It is a romcom with a very dark twist. It is going through a page 1 re-write after I found the end was more malevolent than the beginning. The protagonist has changed quite a lot and I made a major change to one of the other characters. I'm using the fact it is radio to try something different with her character, basically playing with sound. Still enjoying writing it. Should be out for PO3 soon.

Witch's Stone: Teen Horror Novel: After Laura mentioned children's novels are typically 40,000 words I realised I'd got carried away and actually had a trilogy. The first novel is now well blocked out and ready to write but the overall story arc is still a bit rough.

Blood, Sweat and Tears: Comedy Feature: Some adjustments have been made but basically I need to sit down and write this next draft.

Rain On My Parade: Comedy Drama Feature: Reworked my outline and am now happy with the three main characters. Ready to write the first draft.

No progress in: Life to the Full: Drama TV Special, Solitary Sky: SF Radio Play and Under the Thumb: Horror-Drama Stage Play.

So lots on the go but not all have progressed. I've decided to concentrate on getting things finished so the portfolio is thicker rather than leaving them at step outlines.

Hope all your work is going well.

Bloggety Birthday

2009-01-29T20:13:00.002Z

It was my Bloggety 1st birthday last Sunday and I forgot. This means I didn't get myself a virtual present or cake so I'll have to console myself with a real one this Sunday. Hmmm. I think a nice big chocolate cake with sprinkles and whipped cream on top. Nope. Clotted cream and strawberry jam. My arteries will never forgive me.

On the radio script front I decided I liked the ending better than the beginning. I am therefore going to do a 1st page rewrite to sort it out.

That's me sorted for the weekend then. Hope yours goes well too.

Northern Laughs

2009-01-27T20:49:00.004Z

In case anyone gets bored with the Alfred Bradley Bursary applications there is another scheme to go for if you live in the cooler part of England. It's Northern Laughs, a BBC comedy writer development scheme.

Details are at the writersroom and application is via the local screen agencies. These are in the North East, North West and Yorkshire. Deadline is 12th March and you will need to be available for the dates they list.

I've already downloaded my application form but can't make any of the launches so if you are going can you let us all know what happens please?

These are:
Leeds 6-8pm 2nd Feb Carriageworks Theatre,
Newcastle 6-8pm 4th Feb Live Theatre, Quayside,
Manchester6-8pm 9th Feb BBC Oxford Road

Email your full name in the body of the email to: writersroom.events@bbc.co.uk with the subject heading
Northern Laughs LEEDS
Northern Laughs NEWCASTLE
Northern Laughs MANCHESTER

Good Luck

A shout to the Mac users out there

2009-01-12T22:19:00.003Z

I met a fellow writer at the Alfred Bradley workshop. I know, who did I expect to meet, a tapdancing gerbil in a beret? Anyway she is a Mac user and wondered if there were any handy templates or low cost (ideally free) software for radio play writing.

She'd tried the Scriptsmart at the BBC Writersroom with no luck. It gets twitchy (dies) if you don't have the exact operating system version. A search found a Pages Template by Brokensea but we wondered if the Mac crowd kn0w of any other options.

So help. Any of you creative gurus got any ideas? And no "buy a PC" comments from the rest please.

Big Ta.

Alfred Bradley Workshop

2009-01-10T18:00:00.003Z

On Thursday I went to one of the Alfred Bradley Workshops. It was hosted by Charlotte Riches with backup from Stefan Escreet. For those that couldn't make a session I've put a little summary here.

In 2006 there were 371 entries. Because you can submit two scripts this means the number of writers was probably less than that. The writersroom read the 1st 10 pages of all entries. So you need to grab their attention in those crucial few pages. Set the world and characters but keep focused.

The long shortlist of 57 scripts were then read in full. If you reach this stage then you will get comments. A rewrite and resubmitting to the writersroom might then be worthwhile.

The shortlist of 14 scripts were then read by the judges. Of that group of 14, commissions were given to 6 writers. The commission were not necessarily for the script they submitted. They also got mentoring from producers and they propose to repeat that.

In other words the odds are good, based on 2006 about 1 in 92. Remember many will fall at the first hurdle because they think they can just knock something out?

The scheme is looking for 44min Afternoon Plays. I assume the extra minute to make 45 is for credits and stuff. These plays will fill the 2.15-3.00 slot from Mon-Fri and get 6000+ listeners. For length the latest advice is 1 minute per page or about 7000 words total.

It isn't a perfect timing method but even just reading it aloud and timing it helps. Just make sure you aren't on a crowded bus at the time or they'll kick you off and you'll have to walk home. Maybe I shouldn't have tested a horror script when the pensioners were off to get their pensions. Anyway they do allow a tolerance of about 5-7mins.

The slot accepts a range of styles but Charlotte gave a list of things to watch out for. You can use them if valid and you can justify them but don't get carried away.

Inner voice - they see a lot of this. If you can take it out and the story still works then why do you need it?
Setting in the past or future. Why is it important to set the story then?
Too much backstory. The odd flashback is OK.
Long time frames. For example 20 years.
Lots of characters. No more than 6 main ones please. The actors can double up but the audience is intelligent and will spot it. Not too many voices speaking together either. Make the voices different. Remember the audience has no visual clues and are unfamiliar with the characters at the start.
Bad language. Oh **&&%%!
Sex and Violence. It is a more personal medium and the listener won't accept as much as they will on television.

Another tip was to concentrate on story and think in film terms rather than stage. This means go in late, come out early, good pace and not too much talking heads about the philosophy of life. Ah shucks. And I was going to spend 44mins talking about the deep meaningful discoveries I've made staring into my belly button. Bin that one then.

Finally you need to write in your own voice rather than trying to second-guess what they are looking for. Be original and take risks. Write what you enjoy listening to.

The deadline is 28th February and the entries need to be posted. You can find all the details here. One thing to note is you are currently based, have lived or were born in the North. The website clarifies that condition.

Anyway thanks to Charlotte for braving the chilly fells and to Stefan for not racing home to a warm fire at the end of his working day.

Good luck everyone who has a go at this.

Here comes 2009

2008-12-31T14:57:00.005Z

It's been a strange time being off line. Oh. Didn't you notice? No. I'm not hurt at all. I'm just going to sulk in this virtual corner here. And I'm taking the Trifle with me so there.

OK. OK. You can have the jelly and sponge bits. But I'm keeping the custard and cream.

So how come I was off-line? A complete brainstorm. I'd blanked out the run up to last Christmas. We'd ripped out the bathroom and the plumbers had to work flat out so we'd have a working toilet by 4pm Christmas Eve. Did I learn from this. Nope. So this year we were shuffling bedrooms about. Lugging beds and emptying wardrobes. All so a drum-kit would fit in. Bedlam.

The decorations only went up late Christmas Eve and everything that wasn't nailed down got buried. Including our laptops. It is still nuts (Brazils of course) and the corridors are filled with stuff for charity shops, recycling and the tip. The cake is still waiting for me to put marzipan on it and some cards just never got sent out.

So a very belated Merry Christmas to everyone.

And a Happy New Year. May it be a quiet one so you can recover from your hangovers. With a drumkit and two stylaphones (from Father Xmas) in use I don't think mine will be.

I turn my back for a minute and...

2008-12-09T20:17:00.003Z

I go off line for a while thinking -bit quiet, good time to make tea. Come back and find you've all been busy posting and now I've got a mad catch up to do. By the way Jason, notice no "" or even '' used in that first sentence. If you're checking for miscreants.

So what have you all been up to? Seems some kind of drunken gathering from Jason's post. How come those that put their photos on their blogs look completely different in their candid shots? Anyway I note Sheikspear stayed sober enough to tell us what actually happened at the writersroom do. Thanks chuck.

Rob has done his write-up on Survivors and it felt like Deja-vu with similar comments flying round our car as we navigated rabid sheep.

I didn't get chosen for Son of a Pitch and now I find I won't experience the Screenwriters Festival on a balmy July day at a posh house. Instead it is moving to a posh school in October. Back to 4 days too and the discount tickets are now up for grabs. It's planning a bunch of stuff just on DR WHO!!!! Did any of you catch that. Weeee!

And those of us North of the country have the Alfred Bradley Bursary to try for. There are workshops too. Note the Keswick one has been showing the wrong time on the link above. It is actually 6pm to 7.30pm.

Anyway I'll wind up for now cos I've all your posts to read. Oh and maybe a bit of writing will get done too.

Baby's in Black and I'm feeling Blue

2008-11-28T19:07:00.004Z

Any colour except Red it seems. Yep I got that dreaded letter too.

I'm still going to finish off the episode and send it out for feedback. I want to make it as good as possible. It does make you feel a bit down but these things happen.

Anyway congratulations to all who got through, too many to mention here except I will mention Caroline cos I saw her's and it was brilliant. You all worked really hard and deserve it. I don't want any scribofights mind. No disgracing us by wrestling each other to be first interviewed. We're watching you.

As to those who didn't make it. I offer a virtual shoulder to cry on.

Yay to fellow losers Lucy, Robin, Elinor (please prove me wrong on this one), Chip, Stuart, me and anyone I've not spotted yet. I suggest we all have a virtual chocolate fest to recover before knock our stuff into shape and beating them all next year.

MEMEMEMEMEME

2008-11-22T18:17:00.002Z

Just realised that looks a very self-centred title.

Anyway I got tagged for some memes and I'm very overdue in replying. So...

Book Meme: Thanks to Chip. What would you advise people to read?
Name your favourite:
(a) Fiction book
(b) Autobiography
(c) Non-fiction book
(d) A fourth book of your choice from any genre:
Explain why the books are essential reads in no more than 30 words per book.

(a) Mort by Terry Pratchett. First of the discworld series I read and still my favourite. Read how Death steals the show.
(b) The Dynamite Kid by Brian Blessed. The title and author say it all.
(c) Rubicon - The Triumph and Tragedy of the Roman Republic by Tom Holland and Andrew Sachs .I've been hooked on Ancient history since I was a kid. If you find Tacitus and Pliny a slog then give this a go.
(d) The Dark is Rising Series by Susan Cooper. Read it as a child and the imagery is still so clear in my head. Ignore the film. Read the books!

Writing Meme: And even further back I got tagged by Sheikspear. In honour of his 101st blog post he wanted my pet writing hates for room 101:
1. Competitions that tell you what they are looking for then pick someone who gave them the opposite.
2. People who assume if they haven't read your stuff then you aren't a writer.
3. People thinking you are bored and need a distraction because you are reading or writing.
4. Soduku, minesweeper, spider solitaire, etc for sitting on the laptop and tempting me away from writing.
5. Your brilliant idea that no-one has thought of and you work on for months then discover two films and a TV series coming out with the very same story.

Film Meme: Finally I poached this one from poacher Chip (or should that be frier Chip?)
I visit your house/apartment, and you spot me looking at your DVD/VHS shelf.

1. What's on there that you instantly force me to borrow, because it's a great movie and you figure I haven't seen it?
Diner de Cons because it's subtitled and people seem to be scared of that. Wonderful characters and farce at its best.
2. What you do also lend me, because even though it's not considered a classic, it's a personal favorite?
Deep Rising. Gets panned a lot but I love it. Horror and humour that mixes gore with suspense instead of delivering it neat. Can't listen to The Girl From Ipanema in a lift ever again.
3. What movie is on there that you have no rational explanation for owning, and which you try to slide under the couch while I'm distracted?
Cabin Fever.It was going cheap in Woolies. I like horror. Someone told me it was good. Watched it then went out and shot the messenger.

Anyone fancy picking up on these and running with them?

Current Projects

2008-11-10T19:24:00.005Z

I find it interesting reading about all the projects people are working on so I thought I'd do one. If you aren't interested then please feel free to skip to the end. There's a pretty picture.

The list is in rough order of priority but I like to be adaptable. The first three are pretty well fixed but the others may float about or pop up at a quiet moment ahead of schedule. As to deadlines. Well the first one is out of my control but the others I set a goalpost and work towards it but if it needs longer then I don't really fret about it. The joys of writing spec work.

So here's my little list.

1) The Gate (Horror) - TV Series for Red Planet Competition. I've missed decent, non-gloss horror on the telly so I thought I'd write one. Seems lots of others thought the same so a load of us have had a go. Well at least it shows there's a demand and the more the merrier. Anyway getting first episode completed before the deadline. On page 40 so the 1st draft end is in sight. Had been blocked on a bit I wasn't happy with. It felt like talking heads even though they were driving in a car. Found a way to make it more dynamic while also giving more information about the characters relationship so happy now. Until others read it and go WHAT? of course. Then I'll be a blubbery wreck and resort to the chocolate I've hidden away for Christmas.

2) Don't be Koi (Romcom) - Radio. I'm on 1st draft but it is going well. The characters are bouncing off each other nicely and it's got a wierd streak so I'm comfortable with it. I want to get the 1st draft finished this month.

3) Witch's Stone (Teen Horror) - Novel. An allegory for addiction in its many forms. I thought I had the full story blocked out but when I want back to it after a couple of years break I realised I only had half the story. I'm going to write what I've got then free-wheel the rest to get that dreaded 1st draft done. This is my big winter project.

4) Blood, Sweat and Tears (Black Comedy) - Feature Film. This is muck and drizzle rural life rather than chocolate box stuff. A nice bit of grizzly murder to boot. I'm done a page 1 re-write on this one after noting everyone banged their heads against the wall while reading it. My first attempt at a feature film and I just tried to put everything in it. It is very different from the original version now but still has the theme and tone I wanted. All the scenes blocked out so its head down to get this draft finished.

5) Life to the Full (Drama) - TV Special. It's about an old woman and young boy that have become dispossessed from society. Not as gloomy as it sounds. Again the story is all blocked out but I need to get the thing written.

6) Rain on My Parade (Comedy Drama) - Feature Film. Sex and drugs and rock and roll for the over 40s, 50s and 60s. A pet project that I've not got quite right yet. It involves three interlinked threads about some non-conformist women so I know it is harder to write. Keeping the balance but letting people keep track of them all. I have two of the threads in a form I am happy with but one still seems too obvious. Can't have that.

7) Solitary Sky (Science Fiction) - Radio. I wanted to have a go at an SF play. First draft half way throught but still needsa lot of work.

8) Under the Thumb (Horror/Drama) - Stage Play. Set in the near future in a totalitarian state where things get very nasty. The staging of this is integral to the play so I'm still experimenting a lot.

And I've got some more Thoughts for the Day to do of course and there's a lot at the knocking around your head and scraps of paper stage.

Some of you are now thinking (hope it isn't giving you a headache) that might be why I've been erratic posting recently. Yep. 'Fraid so. I found I'd got into a spell of posting to avoid getting down to other writing. Trying to be more disciplined so hopefully a bit less of flood and famine. Unless I get bored of course then I might sneak out a few more.

Oh and I met someone the other day who didn't know who the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse were. What's going on with education these days? Clearly not read enough horror. I can recommend the Book of Revelations for bedtime reading.

And continuing the horror theme, here's a pretty picture. Enjoy.

Horrific Halloween

2008-10-31T18:31:00.003Z

Well Happy just doesn't seem to ring right for a night of chills. We're stocked up on sugar, skeleton swinging in the wind outside the window and mini-rolls with blood filling lined up for later.

I'm now sitting here. Listening to a cat being strangled while it tap dances on an old church organ. Seems this is Tesco's idea of scary noises. Still I can't find the remote control for my scare machine I brought back from the States so it will have to do.

Not quite the same as I've seen State side this time of year. Best one was a friend's house with cobwebs all over and a 6ft tarantula clinging to the wall! Looked for one over here but no such luck so I'll have to get him to post one over. Wonder what customs will make of it.

Anyway. All ready and on Trick or Treat alert.

Have a bone chilling evening everyone.

Thought for the Day

2008-10-30T19:44:00.005Z

Some of you may have noticed a couple of posts ago that I was invited to get in touch with BBC Radio Cumbria by Steve Greaves. Well I did and thought I'd let you know what happened. This is a bit of a long post but I thought I'd write it for those new to this like me.

Steve wondered if I would like to contribute to Thought for the Day. This is just a couple of minutes long and slips into the early commute slot. He suggested I thought about it like writing a letter to a newspaper. I said Okaly Dokaly. All right I didn't really do a Flanders impersonation or Dave would panic and divorce me.

Anyway he then asked how long would it take to produce five of them? Gulp.

Right five pieces, about a page each, plus think time. I reckoned a week. He then booked me in for recording a week later and they would start going out this week. Aaaaah. Deadlines. Not having done it before Steve suggested I sent him each one when completed so he could check if I was on track.

So all I had to think about was what to write about. This is an early time slot, about 07.40, so people would be crawling out of bed, munching soggy cornflakes or trapped in the car. Basically depressed about the oncoming day. Last thing they would want to hear would be someone boring or droning on about the world's woes. At least I wouldn't and I was writing it. So there.

Over two days I came up with a list of about ten topics. I found four of these pretty well wrote themselves while staying funny. In fact I could have kept going for quite some time on any of them but managed to pare them down to about a page. That was hard. No rambling and just one aspect of the topic. For someone who can chat two to the dozen I have to admit I struggled a bit.

Anyway Steve said they were great so I just had to produce one more. Six topics on my list so no problem. Only I'd start writing and they'd become heavy or preachy. Yuck. I couldn't be running out of steam all ready? At last I approached one from a different angle and it fell into place, flying out on that electric highway just before the deadline. Again it got the OK.

That left the recording. I'd never done that before and wasn't sure what would happen. Steve would be at the main station while I was at a satellite one and he said he'd talk me through it remotely but what if I hit a wrong button? Did I press buttons? What about those sliding things. I might spill a drink and ruin a deck. Basically could I be trusted in a recording studio on my own? I can break computers just by looking at them. (I'm currently working blindfold).

Then bad news. I got the dreaded lurgy. Neck like it had two chipmunks hidden in it. Throat like I'd been chewing Guatemalan peppers (Yep another Simpson's reference. Go look it up). Temperature going for 2000deg C. I couldn't even speak!

Lots of magic potions later and I could utter the odd croak again. So Dave ferried me to the studio. They did offer to reschedule several times when they realised the state I was in but I'd got there. I wanted to do it before my nerve broke.

So there I sat in the studio, fluids at hand but safely away from all electrics. Eyes glued to a meter. When it jumped that would mean Steve was on the other end and we'd be off. So I waited and waited. Turned out the newsreader had grabbed the studio at the other end and we had to wait. Hearing the broadcast going out, knowing I would be talking at the end, was nerve wracking. OK I wasn't going to go out live but I mean. My voice. Going on tape. (OK clever clogs it's a generation thing. I KNOW it isn't tape anymore)

Finally a flip of the meter and Steve was on. I crammed the headphones on my head and must have deafened him when I shouted "Steve? Is that you?" Well he was a long way away so I had to make sure he heard me. Things then got really surreal with him speaking, someone else speaking, me speaking and all echoing about like a good old 60s Dr Who effect.

A nice lady dived into the studio my end and pushed some sliders until it all sorted out. I hadn't touched anything. Honest. Steve did mention he had some Dr Who effects but they weren't handy so we did the rest unaugmented.

I then read out each piece while Steve recorded it. It was a bit tricky getting used to hearing myself in the headphones a split second after I spoke but I eventually got used to it. All I had to do was chat away and just repeat a line if I wasn't happy about it. I forgot that. Editing. There I was worrying my voice would give out before I got to the end when Steve could do magic computer stuff to glue the best bits together. Yeah.

Anyway I finished them all with regular encouragement from Steve. Thanks for that. The pieces will now go out over the next few weeks. Steve also asked me to be a regular contributor. Of course I said yes. It was great fun. And good writing practice too. Not only to get stuff written but keeping it concise. Good for those dreaded synopses.

So the first one went out on Monday. Continuing the Dr Who theme my cold made me sound like a Dalek but it wasn't too bad. Anyway why not find out if your local station does the same. They probably say on their websites. Give it a go. Good fun and good practice.

Picture

2008-10-26T19:58:00.003Z

Saw this psychoscribble doing the rounds so I thought I'd show my complete lack of talent in drawing. Especially when using the touchpad instead of a mouse.

You tend to pursue many different activities simultaneously.

When misfortune does happen, it doesn't actually dishearten you all that much.

You are a thoughtful and cautious person.

You like to think about your method, seeking to pursue your goal in the most effective way.

You like following the rules and being objective.

You are precise and meticulous, and like to evaluate decisions before making them.

You have a sunny, cheerful disposition.

Hmmmmm. Not sure about that diagnosis. Following the rules and a cheerful disposition really don't sound like me. Maybe I'm a multiple personality? Shut up. Don't think about it. I do not exist. This is just one of your characters talking.

I've really got to get those characters under control again.

Just a little update

2008-10-05T18:30:00.004+01:00

I seem to have been a bit lax with posting and commenting recently. Sorry.

For those that do comment here you will notice I've had to switch security settings. As a vegetarian I took great offence at a slab of spam being deposited on my blog. I've scrubbed away with e-bleach and anointed with Eagh de Cabbage to take the smell of cadavers away so I hope all is better now. This does mean no more anonymous posts but I think I've only ever had one before this anyway.

Been incapacitated recently. Hobbling about like the witch in Sleeping Beauty (after her makeover to bag lady). This should have meant lots of time for writing but instead I finally installed Black and White on my laptop. These things are really addictive or is it just being an omni-powerful God. Yep I can live with that.

So I need to get my head down and some serious writing done. I have my first episode to finish in my Red Planet horror. In case I get that magic call or email. I know the odds are horrifying but I'm in glass half full mood at the moment. That's to make up for a summer of doom and gloom as I got a string or rejections.

My radio play is coming along nicely. The characters are bouncing off each other well. I have the overall story arc sorted and I'm just writing it out. Less structuring than I would do for a film or TV. I'm letting it wonder off on a tangent if it wants to and then I'll sort out what I like at the end.

I then plan to spend the winter working on some stageplay ideas and a novel I'd put on one side. Is it me or have others noticed a literary feel to bloggers efforts recently. Several working away at novels.

Mine has sat on the shelf for a couple of years. It is a horror again but for teenagers. I'd done the first four chapters and knew what was going to happen in each of the others to the end. Then I went back to it a couple of weeks ago. My full story arc. Hmmmm. More like up to the crisis and then running out of steam. I only have half a story! Got to sort out the rest.

And it has been ages since I've written any short stories. My excuse has been that there's not much of a market for them. I don't write great literary pieces for the more creative magazines or "I met my true love while cleaning out the bins" stuff for the women's weeklies. I just write stories with a dark edge. I think I need to do another market review to see if there's anywhere new to try and place them.

Hope you are all working hard and getting things out there.

Music Meme: Flowers are Red

2008-09-29T18:27:00.003+01:00

Got tagged by Elinor. Rats. So it goes:

Find a song that sums up what you think it means to be a writer and post the lyrics on your blog and why you've chosen it. NB: It doesn't have to be your favourite song, it just has to express how you feel about writing and/or being a writer. It can be literal, metaphorical, about a particular form or aspect of writing - whatever you want. Then tag 5 others to do the same (reprint these instructions).

Had one of those, can remember the song but not the title or singer moments. But I found it. I want my writing to see things from a different angle. To turn things on their head. To keep imagination going. To be the kid that doesn't break.

Flowers are Red by Harry Chapin

The little boy went first day of school
He got some crayons and started to draw
He put colors all over the paper
For colors was what he saw

And the teacher said..
What you doin' young man
I'm paintin' flowers he said
She said... It's not the time for art young man
And anyway flowers are green and red

There's a time for everything young man
And a way it should be done
You've got to show concern for everyone else
For you're not the only one

And she said...
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen

But the little boy said...
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one

Well the teacher said.. You're sassy
There's ways that things should be
And you'll paint flowers the way they are
So repeat after me.....

And she said...
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen

But the little boy said...
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one

The teacher put him in a corner
She said.. It's for your own good..
And you won't come out 'til you get it right
And are responding like you should

Well finally he got lonely
Frightened thoughts filled his head
And he went up to the teacher
And this is what he said.. and he said

Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen

Time went by like it always does
And they moved to another town
And the little boy went to another school
And this is what he found
The teacher there was smilin'

She said...Painting should be fun
And there are so many colors in a flower
So let's use every one

But that little boy painted flowers
In neat rows of green and redA
nd when the teacher asked him why
This is what he said.. and he said

Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen.

Oh and I found a fun youtube clip of a live performance. Keep marching to the beat of a different drum.

Now I tag Sheiky, Oli , Lianne, and Chip. You've probably been already nabbed in which case I double it.

Red Planet Progress - over a fortnight to go

2008-09-13T18:20:00.011+01:00

I've sent my 10 pages out for feedback. Got it back. Ripped and shuffled and sent out again. It has gone through so many changes. And I mean major re-writes rather than slight tweaks. I found my subtle relationship clues were so subtle they were invisible and the poor PO3s were left with "Who are these people?" There again I didn't want any exposition so it was more than just adding a few lines of dialogue. Think it's sorted now.

Like others out there I have struggled with the Outline. I've written them for films before but it seems a bit different when you are squeezing in the information for a series. Or in my case a three series run.

My story ended up following the Lost and Babylon 5 tradition of a multiple series story arc with a definite ending. OK I'm not sure if Lost has an ending or if it will just circle back to the crash in some weird Mobius strip.

Anyway I struggled on this one. I've got the tone, referenced similar work, introduced the main characters and the arena, described how the protagonist changes and roughly what happens over the first episode and the three series. Doing that while keeping my own voice has been the toughest part. I don't want a shopping list but there's only one page.

In the end I wrote it ignoring the length limit then kept cutting until it fitted. It is amazing how much you can take out without changing the meaning.I've still got time to put it aside and read again before the deadline.

In the meantime I have the full episode to finish and I'm alternating that with a radio play. Realised I haven't written one for a while. Instead of thinking visually I'm having to think auditorilly... audiolly...audito...with sound. And it is a comedy rather than the Red Planet horror. Nice to have a change.

And lastly the BSSC Round 2 results are up. Didn't get through but some familiar titles there. Congratulations if you got through and commiserations if you didn't.

The Confidence of the Long Distance Writer

2008-08-23T19:34:00.003+01:00

If you want to tell people your successes then it is only fair to tell them your failures too. I've had a few recently.

I entered the BBC Sharps scheme a while ago and didn't make the shortlist. It's been over 2months and there has been no feedback so I assume I didn't make the long list. I then entered the TAPS Continuing Drama Scheme. Got the letter a couple of days ago. I didn’t get in on that one either. And as an earlier post said, I didn't get anywhere with the Page Competition.

However my response to these rejections has changed. In the past I'd have been in the dumps. Am I deluding myself? Is my work complete garbage?

This time, though I can't pretend I was happy about it, I didn't melt into a puddle of slurry. This time I was happy with what I'd written. So it wasn't what they were looking for on a particular competition or there were others who ticked more boxes. Bottom line I have something I am happy to add to my portfolio rather than being full of doubt and ready to give up.

But is that a realistic confidence and or am I manically delusional? After all I could be a complete nutter who thinks the back of the cornflakes packet is a literary masterpiece? (Well it's not too bad when you're stuck in a hotel restaurant eating breakfast on your own.) The crunch came when I got the Page feedback. How badly did it do?

Well not too bad really. I needed to score 60% to get through and I made 50%. It could have been worse. The feedback was constructive and helpful and honest. If you're going to enter this competition then I would recommend paying the extra for the feedback.

I got 100% for format but I'd have given myself a good kicking for anything less. How hard is it to check spelling or get your layout sorted?

I did very well on theme, imagery and premise. The reader felt it was a poetic piece rather than narrative, which is fine with a short film. This was what I was going for so I was happy with that.

The tricky part was the amount of information implied and whether it was made clear enough. This was the area that had given the biggest range of feedback from others who'd read the piece. Some got what was going on and others didn't. In this case the reader identified with the confused camp. Lots of questions unanswered that the reader felt many would find confusing or irritating.

There was also the issue of conflict. I was representing an internal conflict without a narrative. Not exactly easy. I felt I'd pulled it off. The reader felt differently. Maybe I will if I read it again in a year's time but currently I'm happy.

The bottom line was that it wasn't the type of thing their production company would look for and a more narrative element would be required.

Now I knew this piece was a high risk. Films with a surreal element (and mine's a big element) or are non-narrative (my one again) will appeal to a smaller audience. Some people love them. Some hate them. The reader recognised that a large part of the audience would not get it. And fewer bums on seats means less money.

So what do I do with this piece? I like films that are surreal and leave things hanging. Always have. Don't know what's in the boot with Repoman or the suitcase in Pulp Fiction but that's fine by me. Sat through 2001 as a kid, front row of the cinema and just went along with the ride. Solaris drove the rest of the family out the room while I sat riveted. Twin Peaks was an unmissible and Sunshine was a nice recent trip.

So I personally have no problem with that nature of my short. If I change it then I may increase the chances of it being made but I won't like the piece as much and will feel I've lost something special.

Should I concentrate on writing only stuff that wins competitions or has more chance of being made because it is low risk? Or should I spend all my time writing experimental, surreal stuff that will make people love or hate it but never ignore it.

I think I'll stick with what I'm doing. Let the story decide what it wants to be. Some of my pieces are standard narrative and very commercial. Some…well…aren't.

I don't mind what they grow up to be as long as they make me proud. But maybe I should pay closer attention to what a competition says it is looking for before packing their little suitcases and sending them on their way.

Oh and I will enter Page again.

Tunnel Vision Writing

2008-08-19T22:48:00.003+01:00

Grief. It's been over a week since my last post. I'm getting a bit slack on the posting front. I feel better in that I'm not the only one quiet at the moment.

I'd say it was preferring to be out in the summer sun but even a writer's imagination can't turn gales and torrential rain into whispering breezes and a light fall of blossom . Yes it's lovely scenery in the Lakes but its also sodding wet.

On the writing front I got myself into a rut. I have a bad habit of writing a few pages and then going back over them to make them better and never progressing onto the next bit. Writing in tunnel vision. I have to accept the 1st draft is always garbage but you can't get a 2nd draft until the first is out. So I finally gave myself a good kicking and ploughed ahead regardless. I should really sit something disgustingly eight legged on the Page Up button to make sure I keep going.

I also gave my protagonist yet another hard look. My inner voice kept saying she was boring. Each attempt kept swinging between holier than thou ice queen and wimpy neurotic. I now feel I've got someone I'd like to spend time with and is fun to write. It has required some slight modifications to the story of course but the spine, theme, tone are still the same.

Got to get those 10 pages done. Don't want to be still working on it with only a couple of weeks to go. Hope everyone else's are going well.

Crashing into the Red Planet

2008-08-09T21:25:00.003+01:00

I crashed and burned in Page. I wrote an experimental short about a woman dealing with grief. Problem with those is that people either love or hate them. It's a much bigger gamble. It is still my favourite short script and is through Round 1 of BSSC though. Even if it gets nowhere there I'm not putting it away in a drawer. It will be time to send it out elsewhere.

I've got a bit further with the Red Planet project. The first episode is now plotted out as a series of bullet points and it should make about 1hour. I've now started writing it. Well I suppose you'd really call it blocking it out in more detail. But I'm doing it in feature script format so it looks a bit cooler to me anyway.

I'm putting dialogue in but only what they mean. Very on the nose at this stage but I like to put all that down then go over the whole thing again and replace with what they would actually say.

Blocking out in detail is when I discover something really isn't working. Bullet points can gloss over problem stuff. In this case a suicide. At this stage I'm considering binning that whole sequence and putting something else there because it just seems too stereotypical. It won't be hard because this is the part that gives the protagonist's motivation. I can give her that motivation another way.

BSSC Round 1

2008-08-04T23:30:00.003+01:00

The list is up and my two entries are through. This is as far as I got last year so it's a relief that I've not gone backwards. I am really pleased to see so many others that I recognise on the list too. Well done everyone.

I was a bit nervous with one of my entries. It is experimental with no standard narrative. Reactions have been extreme from those that have read it so far. Some have loved it and some found it just too wierd. But it is my favourite short.

I entered it into Page too. It didn't get through on that one and now I wait for the feedback.

Hope all your competition entries are going well and you are all working hard on Red Planet, BFSC and Rise.

Red Planet Progress - Working on Characters

2008-07-31T23:27:00.005+01:00

I've been a bit quiet on the blogging front because I've been having deep, meaningful discussions with some very strange characters. Most worrying is they have all come out of my head.

It's the stage I've reached on my Red Planet project. So what have I been doing.

1) I worked out what I wanted the series to be about. Not the detailed plot but the underlying theme. Usually I try to do this backwards. Write the story then try and dig for the theme. This time I did it the other way round. Don't know if that's normal or if I will do it again but it is working for this one so I'm not complaining.

2) I then considered the tone and genre. This was very fluid for quite a while and to be honest it didn't stop changing until much further down this list. Currently I am settled in a very dark horror. Yep I'm going for the 9pm slot but I have to confess that the slot fitted the story I wanted to tell rather than my identifying that was what the commissioners were looking for. Nice to see the latest comments from Laura Mackie though.

3) At the same time as (1) and (2) I knocked about a few characters. Some had been sitting around for a while, moaning that I hadn't used them in anything. Way too needy so I locked them away in the big, studded chest again. They'll soon give up screaming. I then went hunting and came home with some brand new ones.

I decided to have a max of 6 characters after studying some of my favourite returning series. These are the ones that appear in most, if not all episodes. A protagonist, an antagonist, two other main characters close to them and two satellite characters.

I love these characters and can't wait to start writing for them. I think this is a good sign.

4) I've written the backstory for the series and for each character. Some of this will appear at different stages, including some that feeds into the series climax but a lot will never appear at all. It helps me see the characters better and makes sure I really do know my story.

I then bounced it all off Dave so he could ask Why does A feel like that about B? Why would C do that? Where's the contradiction in the character (see Lucy's post on that one). I've done this before on courses. The most fun way is to get someone to interview you while you are the character. They don't need to be writers, just nosy. It can be a bit painful when you think you've got the character sorted but I find it really useful. And I can pretend I'm a brilliant actor at the same time.

Interestingly it was the protagonist that showed the most holes. The first character to be found and the drive behind the whole story. Because of this her motivation and behaviour had to be spot on. It wasn't. So more talking to my invisible friend while I pottered around the shops.

Now to get down to the nuts and bolts story. Lots of work still to do before passing it out to others for a good grilling.

Cloverfield

2008-07-19T22:09:00.004+01:00

SPOILERS FOR CLOVERFIELD, THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW

That means stop reading and go somewhere else if you haven't seen it yet. Go on. Press a nice link on the right and read some interesting blogs about things you've already seen.

Right. Still here? So you are the smug lot that can get to cinemas the week a film comes out. You then watch with a self-satisfied grin while the rest of us flit past blogs with spoiler alerts and sit on the sofa, remote at the ready to avoid the trailers designed by morons who don't get that some of us DON'T get to see it until DVD release so DON'T want to know what happens yet.

OK rant over. After seeing a bit more than we wanted in the trailer we dived out and got the DVD to watch before the experience was ruined. Glad we did. We really wanted to see this in the cinema but sprog minders are a bit thin on the ground round here so we've had to learn patience.

We turned off all the lights, pulled the curtains, stocked up on munchies, bribed the gerbils with a skipload of toilet rolls to not spin or rattle anything and settled down. Didn't leave the sofa until it was finished. Didn't want to.

What I loved about the film was that it ignored the big picture. It didn't answer questions like what is the monster, why is it there, what are the authorities doing about it, are there others attacking elsewhere, do the humans win. It just ignored them and concentrated on the people trapped in the middle of it. At ground zero. You knew what they knew.

Personally this is the part of a story that interests me. In "The Day After Tomorrow", for example, the big spectacles of New York flooding then freezing were very impressive but weren't something that gets me back for a repeat view. I wanted to know about the boy's school they kept referencing. How would a bunch of kids cope. What happened to the party that left the library before they died in the storm. Did they realise? Did they doubt? Were they all happy about going or did the group rip itself apart first. I didn't give a stuff about the problems the government had in negotiating refugee access to South America.

I think the Godzilla remake had a similar problem for me. It was about the people in the centre of the decision making. Not about the people in the centre of the consequences. You had the scientists and the army up front. The ordinary people were just a body count passing the camera.

So back to Cloverfield. I wouldn't say it was perfect but it kept me on the edge of my seat and there were lots of moments where I curled into a ball. And those creepy, spidery, bitey bug things.... I spent ages waiting for them to turn up. It'll be now. No. OK they'll be now. No. They'll be.... Aaaaagh.

I loved all the Godzilla references (the original one) and I'm sure there was a bit of The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms there too.

I also felt the characters were established well enough that their repeated rejection of escape was believable. Each had their own reasons for staying and I bought into them. They stayed because they couldn't leave, not because they didn't want to.

Right post over. If you haven't seen the film and read this anyway then you are very silly. Go see it.

Red Planet Competition

2008-07-13T16:43:00.003+01:00

Just in case you haven't noticed the posts on nearly every writing blog out there.... Red Planet Comp is back and Danny is running a helpful blog here.

I entered last year and got nowhere. Looking back I'm not at all surprised. A slow start, overwritten and continual change in tone. I'm better now. Honestly.

So the rules have changed this year. It's TV only this year and we have a bit longer. That's a big relief because last year I took the laptop with me on holiday to get it done in time.

My first thought was still yikes though. I've come up with TV 1hr pieces and half hour sitcoms series before but never thought about 1hr episodes in a series or serial. This means I'm not going to be tweaking something I've already got.

Initial panic passed and I got down to knocking ideas about and brainstorming. I briefly considered trying to second guess what they'd be looking for or checking where holes were in the current output. However I decided in the end to write what I would love to watch and that I'd be happy to add to my portfolio. I did add the extra condition that it had to be something that wasn't already out there.

So I've gone through my favourite series and looked at what I liked about them. My favourites all have two things in common.

1) They are ensemble pieces. Even if the series is named after a single character the other characters are just as strong. And they are all 3 dimensional. No stereotypes, even if they appear that way when you first meet them.

2) There is balance. The series have an overall story, discrete stories for each episode and development of relationships. But they don't let any one predominate.

Well I've come up with something. It's meant to be horror and chucking the ideas down late at night has made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end so I think I'm on track. Let's just say I'm not going out on my own when it's dark for a while.

There's time to bin it and start again if I find it isn't working out but this is going to be my project for the next few weeks I think. If my nerves can take it.

Something Different

2008-07-13T13:31:00.004+01:00

Has it really been 2 weeks since I last posted something? Ooops. Well I've had a busy fortnight. Travelling for work, sprog stuff and village life. For a change I thought I'd give a taste of that village life. Within a 24hr period we had a Ceilidh followed by the Village Gala.

My ankle was playing up but I limped along to watch the Ceilidh so the sprogs could still attend. The younger villagers had been rehearsing at the school so they would know the steps. Then on the night they all cleared off to play hide and seek or act cool instead.

They got hauled back in for the odd dance or to grab food but other than that it was a parent's event. I was able to play the invalid card and have a good laugh at everyone getting steps wrong, cannoning into each other or twirling partners until they lost grip and flew into the crowd. Dancing is a martial art round here. Only one fight this year and that was between two very little boys so quite a civilised event.

Next was the Gala. Like previous years it clashed with the nearest town's carnival. I asked once why we didn't shift dates and was put right. We had that day before they did so the mouse ain't backing down.

We all woke up to a typical warm, summer morning Cumbria style. In other words a downpour. But just past lunchtime it changed to a scene from the Ten Commandments. No, not the parting of the Red Sea sadly but rays of light streaming down onto the Marquee. Well it would have been stone tablets but they were busy patching holes in the church roof.

Everyone raced out to set up the stalls and tables. I was on early washing up duty but there'd been a glut of volunteers so I escaped. Only to get roped into helping set up the coconut shy. There I was, gripping a wooden stake while someone else hammered it with a mallet. Not an easy task our way where most of the ground is 2" topsoil covering slate or granite.

Anyway, just at that critical stage where you're holding a stake up in one hand, balancing two wooden boards in another, gripping string with your teeth while your feet slowly sink into the 2" of mud and you mumble a prayer that voice recognition software's cheap if he misses, the skies opened again. We were soaked in seconds so just kept going.

Rain then held off for the visitors and only returned to finish the Gala with a magnificent storm. Forked lightning, rolling thunder, the works. All we needed was a heavenly choir and trumpets to finish the job.

So what did I get out of it? Well I won a painting by a local artist in the raffle. It was a pastel one so a bit tricky to get home in the downpour. She hadn't had time to spray fixer.

I watched children and parents throwing eggs at each other. They were supposed to catch them but you really get to see the malevolent side of family life when you arm them with missiles. The assault course run by three of the Dads became a water fight after they made the kids jump over the paddling pool instead of walking along a plank. And the women of the village won the tug of war!!!!!!!!

Got to catch up on village gossip. Much more reliable than the local paper and they don't leave out the juicy bits. Also saw the plans for the new village sports hall and added votes on the list of activities to do there. One on the list was pickle ball. Considering the egg incident above I thought this might be a more extreme version but sadly no. Follow the link to find out what all the pensioners are raving about.

Anyway I was completely knackered after all that spectating and staggered home before I got nabbed to take apart the coconut shy. I then put my feet up for the evening and refused to move any more. Who says it's quiet in the country.

Replay

2008-06-30T20:09:00.003+01:00

It's going to be a bit quite around here with so many off to the Screenwriting Festival. Couldn't make it this year but I hope to live it vicariously through their posts.

I said I'd report on the latest for my short play. It had its performance, after some modifications, just over a week ago. The audience was a bit smaller, not everyone wants to see a play twice, but there were new people too. This meant some feedback was on whether the reworks improved things and some was from fresh eyes. A useful combination.

This time the studio was laid out with a stage down the middle instead of at one end. I'm not sure if that worked because one of the actors moved about a lot and had to be sure he didn't obscure the movements of the other.

I felt there were fewer laughs this time (yes it was a comedy) but the audience still said they enjoyed it. Except for a lovely pair of pensioners who felt it was a bit too wordy for them.

This time there was a chance for people to ask questions and most of these were about whether I should expand the play and how. I'd always intended it as a short, complete piece. Half the feedback said it would be nice to expand it, they wanted to get to know more about the characters and I chatted for a while about the backstory for each. The other half felt this would dilute the piece. It is very fast paced and I'm worried I'll lose the momentum and end up padding it to make it longer. I still feel happiest with it staying as a short play but maybe I'll feel differently in a year.

Those that voted for expansion wanted me to make the two characters suffer more. The director, Dan, let me know that pain is funny. His stand-up mate says it has been proved scientifically. So I'm too nice to my characters and I've got to be more sadistic. Hmmm. I'm going to have to develop a nasty streak.

The piece was also selected for a workshop at a literary festival on the border. The aim was to introduce people to the scriptwriting group, show them what it was like to write for the stage and tout for members. The attendees were split into two groups and asked to write the next scene. An interesting challenge when the play's ending is the possible end of the world.

I heard today how it went and the two groups took very different routes. One kept the comedy style and that you are never sure if things are really happening or not. The other group decided it wasn't but made the characters suffer more. Both were great ways forward and I'm chuffed that it gave them very different ideas.

The attendees enjoyed the experience and the play so I think that counts as a success. Unless they all take up writing. Then I have more competition. Oh dear. This could all go horribly wrong.

I'll wind up now. Trying to decide whether to put my next play idea aside for a while or battle on. Currently going for the put it aside vote because it just isn't flowing well at the moment. Lots of other pieces to work on though.

Sharps and Flats

2008-06-23T19:38:00.003+01:00

At 13.05 I logged on to my email area. Held my breathe. Lots of emails in. Scanned. Scanned again. Bashed the monitor and scanned once more. Nope. Nothing. Nada.

Ever the optomist I tried again at 13.30. Still nothing. I mean I even waited until 18.00. How could they keep a girl waiting that long. Guess I'll just have to accept I've been dumped. No shiny, golden email ticket to the BBC Chocolate Factory for me.

Oh well. I am happy with my script and will pop it into my portfolio. And I guess we are all waiting now to hear if we are one of the 100 who will get feedback.

By the way I'm applying to TAPS Continuing Drama. May get bounced but if you don't try you'll get no-where. If you are in the Nations category then it appears you have a little more time. The deadline has been extended to July 11th. For those in Regions the deadline is 27th June so get your skates on.

A bit of classic horror to cheer you up

2008-06-16T22:00:00.006+01:00

Been keeping this in reserve. Had some good news and some bad news today.

Good: My short play has been picked as one of the four for a final performance. We modified them in light of comments from audience, actors and directors then resubmitted. I was one of the ones picked. I'm going to have to stand up and talk about the play then answer questions from the floor so my fingernails have suddenly disappeared.

Bad: Super Shorts semi-final list is now up. I didn't get through. I'm telling myself that there was a HUGE pile of submissions and I just missed so it was quite an achievement. I know I was nearly picked because the sheep are lying down so it must be true.

So here's the little horror present.

Music Meme

2008-06-12T20:14:00.003+01:00

OK I got memed by Sheikspear.

I have to include the instructions below:

"List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they’re not any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now, shaping your spring. Post these instructions in your blog along with your 7 songs. Then tag 7 other people to see what they’re listening to."

Right done. Then list my seven choices. So I dug out my MP3 player and made a list. The I halved it. Then I halved it again. Then I binned any that were already on Dave's list. I think it's leeching on his list but he's my husband so he has to lump it. Mwaaa haaa haaa.

So I got it down to seven.

1. Eurythmics - Missionary Man
2. Fleetwood Mac - Big Love (live version 1997)
3. Jimi Hendrix - Voodoo Child
4. Pink - Who Knew
5. Living Colour - Sunshine of Your Love
6. Snow patrol - Open Your Eyes
7. Verve - The Rolling People

Not many people left to pass it on to cos Rob and Sheikspear did a blitz. I'll doing a modest few. So if you are in the mood folks I'm meming Potdoll so you can relax after casting, Colin and Oli so you can destress after Sharps and Lianne because you've been quiet recently and you're missed.

Writing for Film and Stage

2008-06-11T18:38:00.003+01:00

Spotted this on Rouge Wave about the difference between writing for stage and film. I'm having a go at writing my first full length stage play so it was an interesting read.

Oh and I got my confirmation email from Writersroom today. They've got my Sharps entry so the die is cast.

It's like fellwalking

2008-06-08T19:04:00.003+01:00

Ever climbed a fell and seen the top. Then you get to the top and find it was just a bump and the real top is still to climb. Then you get to the top and find it was just a bump and the real top is still to climb. Then you get to the ....

Well this first nearly half a year has felt a bit like that.

I've been working hard on my bad habit of overwriting. Having come in from a prose background it has been hard to cut the description and action down to the minimum. I love those vivid phrases and all the detail. But if I want to do that I should be tackling a short story or a novel.

Instead I've had to think of the script as a technical document. Something that will be read and used by both the creative and the technical sides of the industry. That isn't too bad because I write technical reports every day. I've found the toughest part has been mastering the balance. It is still a creative document too and so shouldn't be cold, clinical and formulaic. In other words don't be boring.

I think I've hit the balance now but time will tell.

I've also seemed to be chasing deadlines. Don't know if Spring is usually this hectic or whether I've just become more aware of it this year.

I started with loads of deadlines ahead and thought I'd just see how many I'd hit. I quickly realised I'd have to prioritise. What did I stand a chance on and what would expand my portfolio if I missed. That's kept me pretty busy.

I made about 25% of them which was still a lot more than if I'd ambled along writing specs as the mood took me. I need deadlines. I regret not managing to hit Bruntwood. Yes I know the deadline is still four days away but it has to be posted and I don't want to send off an early draft. The work isn't wasted though. The subject fits into Protect The Human too.

I haven't stopped my spec work though. Three features at different stages, an hour long TV drama and a radio play. Plus I need to get back to every1sacritic because the new deadline is on its way.

So does it ease up? All these deadlines? Or do you crumble into a mess.

Mmmmm. Crumble. Off to get pudding now.

Sharps and the half hour drama

2008-06-08T13:37:00.003+01:00

Well my script for Sharps is ready. I've done the application form. I've got my email. I've bought new print cartridges. There's a stack of crisp, clean paper waiting. I've sacrificed the black cockerel. I've spun three times winnershins. I've raced up the nearest fell and back. OK not the last one. Me… running. I don't think so.

I'd like to thank the wonderful people who's feedback got me to the point. Bloggers Dave, Lucy, Elinor and Chip. Commenter Caroline and Non-bloggers Paul and John. Yes I know that's more than three but I'm really insecure and covering all demographics is my comfort blanket.

I used at least one point from everyone's feedback and they all said I was too subtle in showing the history of the characters relationships. I think I've sorted that now. Problem with subtlety. When all the background is in your head, how can you be certain you have put enough on the page?

I also got to read some of their submissions and I think they are brilliant so competition will be tough.

There seems to have been a lot of drop-outs on this one. And many people have scrapped ideas and started again, myself included. So what made it so tough?

Some felt it was the topic. The Nation's Health. The first thought was a hospital or health centre. Everyone's going to write that right? But health is a big topic and they were encouraging people to experiment so it shouldn't be hard to move well away from those areas while keeping with the theme.

However I think the problem was that they asked for a half-hour drama. You don't get to see many of those these days. Yes we have sitcoms. But BBC said they weren't looking for a sitcom. (I suspect they won't turn their noses up at one that ticks all the boxes though.)

So if you wanted a lighter route then that left comedy drama or dramedy or whatever you fancy calling it. There are some brilliant ones out there and it is my favourite viewing but they are about an hour long.

And for pure half hour drama you have soaps, sorry continuing drama. I hate it when the names change. I still buy Marathons, not Snickers! Anway hardly self-contained, excluding the odd one-on-one specials. All those threads from other episodes. I suppose the closest to a half hour drama in the past few years was the Bill in its short form.

Those of us of a more mature persuasion will remember Comedy Playhouse but that was…well…comedy. So there isn't a lot of half hour pure drama on TV as an example. Unless I'm just missing some brilliant stuff because it is on during the day or at sprog bedtime. Please let me know if I am. So easy to miss the gems in the gravel.

I've seen some lovely examples in short films by the way so I would recommend watching more of these. See Short Films on the sidebar of here for a list of sites.

I can understand why BBC chose half hour. You want it long enough to be sure the writer can sustain the quality but not so long that you double the reading time and costs. However with few examples of the form it seems to have proved an interesting challenge.

I haven't tried to second-guess the reader. It's pointless because they will all be different. Instead I've written something I'm proud of and would want to watch. Even if I get no-where on Sharps it is something I'm happy to add to my portfolio so no wasted time.

Good luck to everyone who's entered. Let me know how you do.

Hit a milestone

2008-05-29T00:21:00.003+01:00

It's half past midnight and I just finished as much of my Sharps script as I think I can do before I pass out for feedback. It's down to 35 pages just. I tweaked a couple of descriptions into a single paragraph to squeeze in Fade Out.

As I wrote the thing I fluctuated between worrying there wasn't enough in there to make a 30min script to panicking that there was too much and I'd have to bin so much it wouldn't make sense.

Now I worry it is going to be confusing to others reading it. Or it is emotionally all one note. Or I've missed some huge holes. Or it's just plain boring. I think I've been working on it too long without a break.

Still I've hit one milestone. Now for humiliation and tears. Ooops I mean feedback. Those that said they were happy to read or swapsy, watch out. It's coming your way. After I've had some sleep that is.

Taking a Break

2008-05-26T16:04:00.002+01:00

My Sharps script is progressing but not quite at the speed I'd hoped.

I was travelling again so I thought I'd have time in the hotel room to get some serious writing done. Sadly I had delayed flights, taxi drivers with less sense of direction than me (I can get lost in Tescos) and a hotel room a few inches from a main road. I'm used to country life so street lights, sirens and traffic meant I averaged 3hrs sleep a night.

So back home I had to knuckle down to some serious writing time. I've just finished the 1st draft. Or rather the "spewing it out so you can make sense of it" draft. I'm just taking a break so I can go back and check it with fresh eyes. Not a horror so I'll stick to mine.

I will check that it hasn't rambled off on a tangent, read it as each character to make sure they stay consistent and then make any modifications. It will then go out to those nice victims who have volunteered to read it and rip it to shreds. Then I'll lick my wounds and start at it again.

I had hoped to enter Bruntwood too but I don't think I'm going to make it. I love my idea and it is blocked out well so I'm going to write it anyway but I don't want to kick off a first draft. It might still be ready in time but I'm not going to rush something out that is half baked. And it does fit nicely into the Protect the Human competition so I can submit it there.

Right. Going to potter about for a bit to see what you've all been up to. Read the Sharps script again then off to see Indie. Evening planned.

Cutting Corners

2008-05-18T20:25:00.002+01:00

A lot of cutting going on in my posts recently. Anyway the past week taught me a good lesson in getting too cocky.

I've been working on my submission for BBC Sharps. Lateral thinking had brought up some good ideas. Nothing too predictable. Not a hospital or surgery in sight. Good. I'd then got a rough idea of the characters and I'd knocked out a rough story. So I thought I'd just dive right in this time and start writing. Note all those rough bits in the earlier sentence. Well it was no suprise that the result was... rough.

Stop giggling out there. You've never been tempted to just bypass a couple of stages?

My rough characters were actually screaming stereotypes. My rough plot was so badly knitted together it was more fishing net than cashmere sweater. And that's a net a blue whale could have swum through without breathing in.

I'd start writing a scene and I'd grind to a halt, not knowing how to get to the end I'd planned. I wanted high drama, the characters wanted low farce. It was a mess. So I gritted my teeth and binned it. Back to square one. A week wasted but a lesson learned.

I'm now back with three characters deep enough for that blue whale to go diving in and a plot so tight I can make a cashmere sweater out of it. That or my brain is blubbering in the corner and I'm completely delusional. We shall see.

Cutting Scenes and Characters

2008-05-11T14:24:00.006+01:00

So what have I been working on recently.

Well I finally got back to where I was when I lost my feature plot structure. It took a while because I decided to work it from scratch rather than try to remember it all.

The theme and basic story have not changed but the way I'm presenting it has, again. I think the result is much tighter than before. The big change was moving one sequence from Act 2 to the start. This allowed me to introduce the tone and a taster of most of the characters within the first couple of pages and I could then bin about 4-5 scenes from Act 1.

I'd been told on a course to consider seriously shuffling scenes as part of the writing process but had only made small changes before. A token effort. I'm going to have to make myself do this more.

However all this change has a sad note because I've lost another two characters in the process. One wasn't too painful but the other has been a core element of the story since its first conception three years ago. In fact it was the first character that appeared, triggering the story in the first place. I was really attached to that alcoholic sheep but he will just be a cameo now.

I've also been working on a piece for Sharps and another for Bruntwood. I got the rough storyline sorted for each then let them germinate for a week. With deadlines looming this was hard to do but I am much happier with the results.

Dave hates this stage. I wonder around with a notepad jotting down any random thoughts. Conversations trail off, I become glazed and then a stream of frantic scribbling. Even worse I do this at night too so lack of sleep makes me grouchy.

Now I've just got to write them. The easy bit. Teee Heee Haaa Haaa. More manic giggling...

The Owl

2008-05-10T22:01:00.005+01:00

Just thought I'd show what passes for funny in our house. Kids knew about it ages ago but I only spotted it today. Well I'm a mother. I was busy knitting cardies, baking pies, sweating blood and other mothery stuff.

The first here is a good demonstration of things happening to the protagonist because of what he does rather than just a random string of events. Cause and effect in action. Oh and its really good too. Once there go to Broadcast - Episode Pilote. Yes it's a French animation so it must be cool.

See more of The Owl on here. Oh and Pat and Stan are good too. I admit it. I'm a big kid.

Kill the Clique

2008-05-05T22:42:00.003+01:00

Adrian Reynolds has done an interesting post here. It concerns your attitude to life affecting your writing. It got me thinking about how open I really was to other's lives.

We will all carry our own prejudices about and they can't help but sneak into our writing. But the more you mix with people outside of your normal circle, the more your assumptions will be ripped apart.

But where do you do that? How do you meet people these days that have different lives from yourself? Is it really true that people are spending less and less time outside of their home or workplace?

Once I left school it seemed people quickly drifted into their own groups and rarely ventured from them. It might be a natural process. We are pack animals after all. Even being aware of this and making a concious effort not to do it can be hard. And it does affect your writing.

My job involves me meeting a wide variety of people which makes it easier for me to experience, vicariously, other's lives. And I like to listen so they are happy to talk. I'd go nuts stuck in the office with the same faces every day.

I also tend to get roped into lots of committees outside work. This again means a mix of people and is in theory a great chance to listen. However I also notice how easily even these form cliques.

So what am I saying? If you want to be a good writer - kill the clique.

Anyway this one was a bit rambling so I'm off to get a nice hot chocolate.

We're going to need a bigger boat

2008-05-01T22:40:00.006+01:00

No it's not about Jaws. Though there is some fishing involved.

I did wonder how to write this one because I didn't want it to sound smug. But then I thought sod it. Just say what happened. The old timers can have flashbacks to their first paying audience, those also at the "weeee this is fun" stage can go weeee again if the mood takes them and the newbies can see what's ahead. Soon. As long as they keep tapping away and listen to Danny when he says "A writer writes. End of Story."

Anyway back to the boat. I went to see my short play Paddling last night. It was one of 11 being shown.

I left clear blue skies and warm breezes to drive through hail, floods, gales and some good old thunder and lightning. Someone clearly didn't want me there but I'm a stubborn old cuss so kept going.

Car park was packed but we managed to squeeze into a far corner. We then raced across the new river that had replaced the tarmac. OK they ran. I sort of waddled. Well its been over a year since I last wore heels. Finally we made it.

I did get some odd looks. Don't know if it was my clutching Dave in terror or the stuffed toy owl tucked under my arm. Ian Hinde, one of the directors, hadn't been sure if they could get a stuffed seagull so I brought back up. I raced, sorry minced, over and he just grinned and said "wait and see." Some friend. So I ended up nursemaiding the blasted thing all evening because Dave and my eldest refused to be seen dead with it. The baby of the family had already escaped to a sleepover.

We were in the Studio rather than the main theatre and I'd been told the turn out would probably be small. After all we were competing with Oklahoma. Imagine everyone's shock when we were only 12 seats short of a full house. That's nearly 90 people, not including the cast. And before you scoff remember it's relative. An angry mob of 90 berserkers = terror. A chirpy cluster of 90 cherubs = happiness. Or time for another trip to the detox clinic.

Maybe Oklahoma sold out and they didn't want to waste the coach hire. Anyway there we all were and center stage was a dingy. With a stuffed seagull on it. To my horror this meant mine was on first.

So I'd better explain a tiny bit about my play. The other director Daniel Bye (yep there were two) said it had the highest rate of props/second of any play he'd done. It was 5mins long and in that time the actor in the dingy, Wad Davies, had to manhandle a newspaper, oar, stilton drum, french stick, stuffed seagull, umbrella, bucket, trombone and anchor. The actor outside the boat, Ian Stokes, had a clipboard, pole and a big red button to deal with so got off a bit more lightly.

They had managed to get all the props except the trombone. In fact Ian S had made a lot of them, including the stuffed seagull!

Anyway the audience laughed... where they were supposed to laugh. The audience and cast didn't say anything bad at the scary feedback session so I could let blood back into Dave's fingers. I was pleased with what the directors and actors had done with it and the actors also voted it as one of their two favourites which was really nice.

So what did I learn? There's a lot of visual comedy in my play, hence the props, but the one thing I'd never done was imagine a pile of these things in a dingy. Lets just say it was a little bit of a squeeze. At one point the french stick got sat on so was rather bent when it got waved around. That got an extra laugh.

But Wad did have to do a lot of fishing about because things got pushed out of plaice. (I couldn't resist it, sorry). I apologised for burying them in props but they said that could be sorted with more rehearsal....or a bigger boat.

Comparing with the other plays.

Those that were self contained rather than extracts seemed to go down better with the audience. But then the extracts are a snapshot from a long story so it is really an unfair comparison. Personally there were several extracts that made me eager to see the whole work.

Some were more action. Some more dialogue. The comedy tended to be heavier on action with the dialogue much faster paced. Shorter sentences. Quick volleys between the characters. The drama was heavier on dialogue and bigger blocks of it from each character. I noticed several where the dialogue seemed quite natural for the stage but would have been binned by a film reader as too much black on the page. Talking heads.

So I've got to pay more attention to the difference in film and play. You can be more static and have more dialogue with a play. But I'll have to make sure I don't go too far and have two people standing there, static, rabbiting about nothing for 90mins.

Talking about rabbiting. I wonder if this is my longest post. I'll let you move onto something more interesting like the link in the post below. Go on. Disappear now. You have writing to do.

BBC College's Cuddly Brother

2008-05-01T22:35:00.002+01:00

OK I wanted something beginning with C and so it got cuddly. Anyway, they've announced it. The writer's scheme for those who couldn't apply for the Colleges or didn't make it in. See it here and good luck.

Yes of course I'm going to have a go.

BBC Comedy College

2008-04-25T11:23:00.003+01:00

Michael Jacob has announced that all interviewees have now been contacted. It's in the comments section here. Didn't get mine unless it got jammed in the wire when competing with all the job offers that failed to get through.

Oh well. Just got to keep at it and lots of other chances coming up. The first performance of my short play Paddling is on Wednesday so butterflies bigtime at the moment.

Did any of you get an invite to the interviews?

Purrrfectly lovely

2008-04-23T18:16:00.006+01:00

Not a writing thing strictly but this got passed round the office today and I couldn't resist. The man clearly owns a cat. As should all good writers by the way. Who else can you have a sensible conversation with at 3 in the morning?

He has more here and apparently there is another in production. Out soon.

Aspirations and Inspirations

2008-04-20T22:00:00.007+01:00

Ever been asked what kind of writer you want to be? It's something I've been asked on courses and sometimes ask myself. My standard response is that I want to have a body of work that I can look back on and be proud rather than stuff that just hit a deadline.

So the next question is what would I be proud of? Well the easiest way of replying is what do I wish I could have written. Well easy in theory, but I hate to leave anything out. The film list on the right is probably a good clue at how I can get carried away. And I'm forcing myself not to add to it.

Favourite 5? Do me a favour. Favourite 10? Oh rats, each time I squeeze one in, another I can't do without drops off the end. Favourite 100? Could I just add a few more please?

Deep breathe. Be strong. I'm going to list the first ones that spring into my head.

Edge of Darkness by Troy Kennedy-Martin. If any is on top of my list I think it has to be that one. Each character is memorable and multi-layered. Lots of subplots feeding into the main one. Tragedy, thriller, comedy and horror. And that reality-fantasy mix that I love so much. I've watched it so many times and don't get tired of it. If I could write like that...

Unless its Shooting the Past by Stephen Poliakoff. Missed the recent repeat and haven't got it on DVD yet so it's more the fact it sits in my memory so well. I know it is a much slower, gentler pace than is expected these days but the pace fits the story and I didn't find it hard to sit quietly and just experience it. It makes me calm just remembering it. Got to buy that DVD.

Right, that's two TV ones so on to films. But, can't I just add... Nope. Films.

I did a quick scan of my DVD case because my mind went blank. Not as a comment on film writers but because I got sensory overload.

So we have Billy Liar by Keith Waterhouse and Willis Hall. Yes I know it started as a novel and a play but I know the film version. Again the reality-fantasy mix. Great characters and a gentle pace. Wonderful dialogue. The start, moving past a range of households along with a "housewife's choice" radio broadcast sets the scene beautifully and gave me plenty of flashbacks.

Then one that a few of you might not know but please ignore panic at subtitles. It's worth it.
Le Diner de Cons by Francis Veber. At this point I am sobbing in a corner because I've just found out there's a US remake planned with Sasha Baron Cohen. No pleeeeease. This is a subtle farce with beautiful characters, great dialogue and..... Sorry. Overcome by sobbing again. All I can say is see the original first.

I'll stop it here. Maybe another post later on stage plays.

Wasted from Writing

2008-04-13T23:51:00.002+01:00

I am shattered. I was off travelling last week. Took my memory stick along so I could work on my every1sacritic submission. Then I got a call from Dave. STOP. Wonderful Robin had shouted the deadline was shifted until August so why not try Comedy College as well.

So I spent the time working on the BBC Comedy College submission after all. Didn't think I'd manage it because my old sitcom script was 4yrs old. Time flies... Reading it again was humiliating and I wanted to get the petrol and burn it.

Too much woodwork in the hotel room so I buried it in a far recess of the computer instead. Somewhere near the Microsoft Works folder that came free with the laptop.

So I took the basic idea and characters then did the old ripping apart and putting together again. I blocked out the first episode and sorted the full series storyline. Just had the first 10 pages to write. One weekend, no problem.

Then disaster struck. A sprog event, a visit from a relative and another from an old school friend I'd not seen since my wedding. So 2 days went down to 6 hours, if I slept.

Well I didn't sleep much. I tried but poor Dave had to endure me turning on the light every half hour to jot down more notes. He'll cut the plug off one day.

I got it done and sent out to a few people with a "pretty please help" and got feedback enough for a terrible trio. Thank to Robin again as one of them.

I did some more rewriting and just sent it off. If this is the pace the rest of you work then I might have to turn to coffee to keep going. Yeugh. Maybe I'll do extra strong chocolate instead.

Getting Sentimental

2008-04-05T22:01:00.002+01:00

(Spoiler if you've not seen the last episode of Torchwood yet)

Speaking of which I had a little cry on Friday night at Torchwood. Family is used to it. I sobbed my heart out at the end of Blake's 7 and it's been downhill since then.

I had a feeling Owen wouldn't make it (or would continue not making it) but Tosh was a shock. Owen had started to show a soft side and Tosh had begun to toughen up and then they're gone. I'd wanted to see what they were going to develop into.

If character development means your end is near then Ianto may be at risk. And I've really liked the Everyman role he's taken. A bit of down to earth dry sarcasm. Nice.

However I don't sob at just anything. It has to be quality. If it's deliberately sentimental and slushy it has no effect at all. Most "women's films" leave me cold. I really, really, really hate that label. What kind of women are they targeted at? It's melodrama with a big C, which is usually what kills one of the main characters off with warning, and headlines and flashing lights so you know its coming. "I have a bad headache." Right, brain tumour.

That doesn't mean I hate films that have a mainly female cast. Calendar girls tackled many of the topics in melodrama but it wasn't over-sentimentalised. I watched that one surrounded by the WI who had turned out on mass. A bit… surreal.

And you have Descent, Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown, 8 Women and Volver. I could imagine meeting (and have met) women like those in real life. Except they don't tend to break into song every few minutes.

I'm struggling to think of a big budget Hollywood film that would fit here. Hmmm. Wonder why that is? Anyone able to suggest one?

That old Writer's Block dropped by again.

2008-04-05T21:59:00.001+01:00

Well I got a lot more completed than I expected this week. I've sent off a batch of shorts for competitions and done some feedback. I also got an entry into Coming Up, which I didn't think I'd have time to do. An idea grabbed me so I ran with it.

It seems there are a load of deadlines all looming at once and I don't have a big enough portfolio yet to just chuck something out. This leaves me with a dilemma.

Do I go for the BBC Comedy College and maybe not even have my work looked at because my CV isn't loaded with successes (yet?). Or go for Every1sacritic and maybe get my CV in better shape for BBC next year. They share a deadline. So I asked a couple of people who knew my stuff and they told me what I really knew already. Wait a year for BBC and go for the other.

But it isn't easy, what if this was THE break and I didn't even go for it. But if you stretch yourself too thinly and chuck out something you've had to knock together in a hurry then you won't get anywhere at all. I'm stuck between a granite clump and a rigid flat fish.

Anyway I've gone for Every1sacritic. I considered trying to get my current sitcom episode down to 15mins but decided in the end to start afresh. So there I sat. Blank sheet of paper in front of me. Pen in hand. And nothing happening. Zilch. Nada.

I usually get round this by doing a stream of consciousness. Just chucking any old garbage on the page. Let it form into something rational (or not) and then bin the beginning and pick through the rest for something interesting. So I shut my eyes. Raised the pen and let rip. Ten minutes later I looked down. Some sod had nicked my brilliant ideas and replaced it with a blank piece of paper!

I haven't had writer's block for ages. Must be lack of sleep from bureaucrats playing with clocks again. So I tried a more structured approach.
1) Think of a place.
2) Think of two people that are opposites.
3) Trap them in close proximity.
4) Now find a catalyst to push them over the edge. In this case I chose another character. So I've got a three-hander. The old top of pile, bottom of pile and the go-between … well … between.
5) Then turn up the heat and sit back to see what the characters will do. I made the temperature drop instead, literally.

They are turning out quite fun at the moment but I won't be sure if the idea has perambulating appendages just yet. I might still bin it and come up with something else.
But I'll keep the characters regardless. I'll tuck them away in a nice padded cell for a later date. I get really attached to my characters and can't bear to bin any of them.

Write On

2008-03-30T14:04:00.004+01:00

OK a naff title. But it gives me the chance to use my favourite insult. Naff. It's an age thing.

So I got my head down and did some serious writing. OK re-writing. OK in a couple of cases rip into tiny pieces and stitch together again. Lucy made sure I used the machette judiciously.

Today I'll be sending out shorts to BSSC, Supershorts and Page. Then on to longer stuff.

I've a sitcom that has sat there for 18months. Time to dig it out and give it a critical read. I suspect I will keep the underlying idea and the plan for each episode but bin the rest. If you hear any piteous screeches it will be me, horrified by on the nose dialogue, direction to actors, and a multitude of other crimes I committed back then.

Hopefully it will be redeamable enough for the BBC Comedy College. I'm not sure if I have time to write something from scratch.

I hope to also get an idea in for C4 Coming Up. But only if an idea grabs me.

All this means I need to keep writing hard. Hence I've been a bit quiet on the blogging front and expect it will be a weekly entry next week too. I am reading you all though. After all I need a sanity check.

Oh and Robin did a link to this for a checklist on how to keep that writing going.

Keep your pencils sharp.

Procrastinating in Bookshops

2008-03-22T23:02:00.008Z

Well I've not got much writing done this week. My Alter Ego, Aunty Ethel, was flat out trying to clear her desk before the holiday. Still ended up having to work remotely to finish it off so too knackered in the evenings.

However I've procrastinated enough. I did a check on deadlines and it scared me rigid. Can't keep finding pencils to sharpen and cupboards to clean. OK, I don't do the cleaning cupboards thing. I've been known to dump stuffing out of a box and wonder in passing when they'd added extra sage to the recipe. But honestly, bread mould is just another form of penicillin isn't it? And no-one actually died.

So what deadlines are brewing?

26th March Wed: Hotbed <30min Stageplay
28th March Fri: BSSC Early Deadline
31st March Mon: Supershort Late Deadline
04th April Fri: C4 Coming Up 30min Deadline
07th April Mon: Supershort Without A Box
11th April Fri: Harper Bazaar Short Story Competition
14th April Mon: Deadline for College of Comedy Application
15th April Tue: every1sacritic 15min play
15th April Tue: Page Feature and Short Competition Late Deadline
01st May Thu: Nicoll Fellowship Application
13th June Fri: Bruntwood Playwriting Competition
28th June Sat: BSSC Late Deadline

Doubt I'll make them all but if I fail on one I can use some of it for the next.

(Update: Lianne has just issued her latest deadline list. Always worth checking out.)

I've also set myself a deadline for my feature treatment. To chuck it Lucy's way before the end of the week. She's got some free time so send your stuff in. Really good value and very comprehensive notes.

I am also a bit depressed after a visit to the local bookshop. Usually it makes me feel a lot lighter in spirit (and pocket too). Don't need booze to feel better, just to wonder round a bookshop. However I overheard a couple of conversations. OK they spoke so loudly you probably heard them yourselves.

Conversation 1 between two 13yr-ish girls.

Girl1: What's this?
Girl2: A bookshop.
Girl1: So they sell books?
Girl2: Guess so.
They swagger over to the comic book section.
Girl1: Eugh. Seen what these girls are wearing?
Girl2: Gross.
Both look the store over.
Girl1: This stuff is so boooring.
Girl2: They've got booky-wook?
Girl1: Nah. There's nothing here.
They strut out.

Conversation 2 between designer mum and 8yr-ish daughter.

Girl: Can I get this?
Mum: What's the point, you're wasting your token?
Girl: But I really want it and it says 2 for 1.
Mum: But it costs more than your token. You can get a book with your token.
Girl: It's only 6.99
Mum: How much? What a waste of money. Come on. Debenhams has a sale on.
Mum dumps book back on shelf and drags daughter out.

I bought my kids their first books before they were born. I read The Hobbit to them when they reached four. With all the voices. (Tip, don't start with a different voice for each dwarf. You can't keep track but they can.) My youngest will voluntarily go to bed early if it means a bedtime story. And they traipsed round Hay on Wye without protest, buying as many books as I do.

I feel sad that they may become a minority. All those children missing the chance to make their own films in their heads.

OK. So what am I going to do to beat this funk. Read, write and watch some films. With a bit of chocolate on the side of course. After all it is Easter.

Happy Easter everyone. No slaughtering the Easter Bunnie.

Anthony Minghella

2008-03-18T18:50:00.003Z

Just heard the terrible news on the drive home. His work could make me laugh and cry with subtlety. He was the first writer who's career I was aware of. Especially as he came from near my home town.

An awful shock and a sad loss. My thoughts and wishes are with his family.

Showmanship

2008-03-16T18:38:00.004Z

So how much people watching did I get done while away? Not as much as I'd planned.

There was the bloke who put a DVD on for his product then hid behind the plasma screen for 3 days. Each time we looked he was wading through a 8" high stack of paper, carefully turning each page. So we decided he was a novelist dragged out of his garret.

We did consider sneaking over and replacing the manufacturing process DVD with a Life on Mars one. But then his stand would get more attention than ours. So in future we might make an animation of Sam being hit by a car using our software. After all our animation of a boyscout sliding down an aerial-runway always gets a big response. Especially when he flies off the end and bounces along the ground.

We had the manic nose drillers. How can you walk around in a crowd with a digit shoved up your nasal passage? Doesn't it make breathing tricky? There were the bosses hiding out from their own stands. Juggling, playing rugby, how old are they? I met one panicking kiosk staffer who hadn't had a chance for her double caffeine fix and the queue was building. I made them wait so she could get human.

And there was the usual waltz around at the stall edges. It's like hunting.

1) They stand in the middle of the corridor and watch."I'm just looking, Come near me and I'll run." If you approach they'll go all flustered. They may take some details but only to dump in the bogs later. Conference centre cubicles are full of dumped brochures. Best you can hope is a smile will tempt them in. You let the lure lie still at their feet. Don't even touch the string.
2) They make eye contact and step forward. "OK I'll let you approach but be gentle with me." A reassuring voice can work here but carefully. They could still bolt. Tug the string a little so the lure twitches, ever so slightly.
3) They hover on the edge of the stand. "I'd like to talk but you seem scary". A chance to rest their feet while you show them some pretty pictures usually works. You slowly draw the string in, moving the lure closer.
4) They step onto the stand. "Ready for business?" Yank the lure home. You've got them.

OK. I'm not as ruthless as that. I just love to chat and if we get a sale in the process then all the better. But I don't worry if they walk away. It killed some time. I'm just not a salesman and to prove it:-

......ME and COLLEAGUE on a stand. ME chats to a visitor, LAMB.
Me: Why don't you sit down and I'll show you the software.
Lamb: I can tell your a salesman.
Me: Are you kidding? I'm completely undiplomatic. I once went to a meeting with a client and
slagged off their software, forgetting they wrote it. This is the only sales thing they risk
sending me on.
.....Lamb sits.
Me: So what part of America do you come from?
Lamb: Australia.
Me: See, I can put my foot in my mouth anywhere.
....Colleague collapses in corner, head in hands.

Still the bloke stayed and is looking to buy so maybe ditsy is a legitimate sales technique. I also asked the same question of a Canadian. Annoying thing is the brain was telling me where they were from but the gob carried on regardless. I've got to slow down talking and give my brain a chance to step in sometimes.

A few of you may have noticed I have the same problem typing. I touch type as fast as I think (or faster sometimes) so there's no editing as I go and I can't fight that little devil that whispers "Press Post. Go on. What can it hurt? Go on...Go on...Go on...Go on..." . Ooops.

And before the testosterone brigade ask, no the grunts seem to have finally lost at this show and all women were thankfully suitably clothed.

I also got some decent meals this trip. Traditional Chinese (so lots of veggie options), Caribbean (Yeeees. I can't get decent plantains and okra round here) and my first trip to Wagamama.

That was my baby sister and an old student buddie. They wanted to see my face when people started scribbling on the tablecloth. They weren't so sure when we struggled to find it and I just walked up to a stranger and asked. In the middle of a city. A big city. Where they think you're nuts if you even make eyecontact. Can't see what all the fuss is about. I asked. They answered. Problem solved. City folk huh.

Anyway, winding up now. Tea to cook for sprogs now they'll let me out of their sight. I think they missed me. That or we've been having another earthquake and they've been clinging to my arms and legs to stop falling over. And yes, Dave missed me too.

Doom and Gloom

2008-03-16T17:09:00.005Z

Well I got the dreaded email yesterday. I'm one of the 1490+ who crashed out of the Pitch in Time. Just what I wanted to come back to. So I've finished licking my wounds and stomping round the garden. Believe me that's not easy. We've got tigers in them there 6ft high brambles.

My commiserations to fellow jetsom - Elinor, Sheiky, Chip and the rest of you. We woz robbed.

On to the next challenge. Sheiky had a good one here and another was sitting in my in-box here. I've got an idea involving misunderstandings on sexual preference in a minisub for the next play. Maybe I should get it written. But first I've got my re-write to finish and pass over to Lucy for a check.

I did get some stuff done in the hotelroom, in between watching Life on Mars episodes and Sunshine.

Hope some of you out there hit lucky.

Conference Break

2008-03-09T16:58:00.003Z

Don't know if I'll get any posts out over the next week. I'm off to a conference and you can never predict what Internet connections the hotel will have. Last trip the wireless was down and the socket fell out of the wall so I ended up balancing my laptop on my knee in a freezing lobby.

I've just got to sort out my survival kit. Memory stick of notes and scripts. Folder of DVDs. Bag of books. Some munchies. If I remember I might squeeze in some clothes too.

In theory I should have plenty of chance to write. No distractions in the evening. Doesn't seem to work out that way but I always go prepared. And the thought of heading out without at least 2 books to read. Horrors.

I'm running a stand on this one. This means 80% of the time with it empty, and me trying to look approachable. You have to be careful you don't overdo that one or you get the wrong sort of business proposition.

In theory I could spend the quiet time tapping away but someone grimacing at a screen can be a bit off-putting. Even worse if you are shout out "My mobile's covered in sh*t" because you've got carried away practicing dialogue. Though that wouldn't phase my regular clients.

Still it doesn't stop me people watching. There are the regulars:-

The doddery old bloke who still manages to dart onto the stand and grab any freebies. They then disappear into his shopping trolley and you follow his progress by the string of yelps. Each year I think it will be his last.
The ancient 4ft 5 director with his nubile 6ft 1 secretary clutching his arm. The most fun is watching the faces of the blokes as the pair stroll past.
The flotilla of wives following a Middle Eastern delegate. They look so bored and it only takes a smiling face to cheer them up.
The young girls hired to decorate stands and bored out of their minds. Pencil skirts and killer heels. Any salesman thinks that's a good combination should be made to wear them while on their feet for 9hrs solid handing out brochures. I'd enjoy watching that.
Though it is rarer these days you still see the odd ones expected to wear T-shirts and shorts in the freezing halls. You bump into them in the loos, trying to warm up and checking their forced smiles before going over the top. If might be fun if they were dealing with Gene Hunt but it'll just be some sad perv salesman. Rule of thumb. If they are selling their products with young girls its 'cos the products so bad it can't sell itself.
Then there're the new graduates. The "I've got a degree and know it all" brigade. Power suited and thinking Wall Street is a guide to success. For heaven sake they weren't even BORN when Wall Street came out.

We've had great fun with the graduates because they still leap to assumptions. So here's the scene. Short, dumpy me in comfy shirt and trousers, don't do formal. My male colleague in smart suit towering over me, lets call him Fred. Powersuited smart-alec marches to Fred so I have to dive out the way. He then turns his back to me and steps back so I have to move even further. Consider myself dismissed.

Smart Alec: I'm here to check you out for my boss. If you're good enough then he'll see you on our stand later. So does this stuff do Coupled Analysis?

Fred: Sorry you'll have to talk to our expert.

Fred spins the schmuck round to face me.

Me: And how is Bert (the boss) doing?

Oh the lovely look on his face when he realises what he's done. Magic. But I don't twist the knife, a chuckle is enough. I'm an old softee.

So have a good week. I'll pop by if I can.

Musings on Age and Gender

2008-03-07T00:10:00.002Z

Don't know why but I've been pondering these two recently but they keep kickboxing round my head. If I must write what I know then can I only write about women who've just entered middle age? The ones who juggle family, work and time for themselves.

Hold on. What's that last one again? Oh I remember, when I could stay up all night for four nights in a row and it was OK because I could curl up in bed and recover all weekend. Me.e.e.emoreees.

So do I write about that type of woman? Sometimes. But I write about lots of others too. So what makes me think I can understand what it's like being someone else?

I think I have to go back to that phrase "Write what you know." Do I really think I can't write about being 20yrs older? Well I can remember how I was at 20yrs younger and that hasn't changed much. A few corners knocked off and the casings a bit faded but I still feel the same.

And I think that's the key. Feelings. We've all run the gamut of them in our lives. Is it so hard to empathise with someone of any age feels walking into a crowded room to be ignored? Or when they receive praise after battling to achieve something?

There will be differences in how people respond to those emotions due to the society they were formed in (be it geographically different or in time). Also differences due to gender. But can't these be identified by observation or research?

Personally I love to people watch. I'm lucky that my alter-ego deals with people from all over the world so I get to see quite a range. And I love those differences.

I've chatted about hill farming and childhood on a train with an Indian lady who grew up under the British Raj. I've talked to naval cadets heading home from their first stint away and an actor who'd just finished his first time on a film set.

I've had my ear bent by an old man convinced Maggie Thatcher was trying to bump off the Royals and two blokes from Liverpool who'd had a dry flight back from the Middle East and just wanted to get to their local pub. I've also had gross out competitions with my son and his mates. I WIN.

But how successful have I been at getting into someone else's head? Well I've sold stuff with a younger woman, won stuff with older men, been shortlisted with young men to old women. A good mix.

I've also let people read my work from the groups I'm writing about and they haven't laughed me out the room, yet. One even wondered how I managed to get in a man's head so well. How could I not? There's so much room in there. Sorry. Couldn't resist.

I do choose not to get into some heads. I wrote a very dark piece once about an abusive relationship. I'd not been in one myself but let my characters run loose and didn't edit or censor it. Someone who had been in that type of relationship then read my piece. I was surprised when she said I'd captured the situation well but it was very disturbing to write and not something I particularly want to repeat.

So what am I trying to say? That maybe hiding away in the garret isn't so hot for your writing. Get down that pub. Go to that party. Get involved in things. Don't stick your earphones in when you're on a plane, bus or train. Talk instead.

Go on then. Stop reading this post and get out there.

Character Notes and Mother's Day

2008-03-02T17:20:00.004Z

So update time.

You have hopefully noticed a few changes to the main page. If anyone can tell me how to match title background to main background then please feel free. I've tried the palatte in settings but that shade isn't there. Plus the editor refuses to accept any hexidecimal codes I type in. It's making me feel so #0000A0.

Still it isn't too bad and I really can't be bothered to change to a different template so it will just have to stay like that. If you are wondering, the smiley face is my bagpuss of a cat.

The character notes for my play are now heading out to possible actors. Ooops. Maybe I should have sent them to definite actors who will possibly appear in my play. The more experienced scribes wrote a paragraph on each character. Muggins here only had two characters so did a table comparing the two.

Jed lives alone. Col lives with his cat.
Jed never had a family. Col's family left him.
Jed was Cock of the School. Col was the Class Wimp.
Jed feels that if order is observed he is safe. Col feels that if moral right is observed he is safe.

There was a lot more like what they eat and their politics. Still I was told it was OK and it is now out there.

The writers in the group were all very friendly and helpful. Some were beginners but others have been working for years in TV, radio, stage and publishing. They were worried I'd be bored while they discussed the logistics and costs for rehearsals, staging and ticket sales but it was fascinating. All these things you don't consider while you tap away.

So I then made the long drive home through winding, empty country lanes. Orion twinkling though the branches above. Shimmering uplights from my headlights bouncing off puddles and reggae blasting out on the radio. The perfect start to a horror film.

I've just sent off 150 words to go into the programme. I think it sets the tone without giving away the punchlines.

Now to cook tea then tuck into Chocolate Cake. My Mother's Day present along with wooden tulips from my daughter. Now if I can just persuade his lordship to rub my feet I'll be sorted.

Movie Posters Post

2008-02-28T23:53:00.021Z

Can't sleep after my play meeting and the long drive home so I'm blogging again. Yep. That'll help me wind down. Sit here juggling on the Html. Because it always puts stuff exactly where you want it, doesn't it.

OK. There's been a wee Movie poster conversation starting to germinate at Sheiky's patch. He wants to see our fav. posters so I've been digging.

Once upon a time, long ago and far away (or down the coast a bit) I was an innoscent little student freezing away in her student room. You could shove fingers through the gaps in the windows. Hell you could shove your room-mate through the thing. The electric fire only had one bar working and blew the fuses. The communal living room had no ceiling because it rained one day. Basically we aspired to the Young One's Hovel.

So what did we cover the flourescent lime green woodchip with? Film Posters of course. And I had the best cos baby sister worked in a video store. Look, if you're too young to know what one of those was go look it up.

I tried finding some of those posters but many seem to have disappeared. So I've done my best. The pickies below show posters I'd be happy to put on my wall in their own right. Regardless of the quality of the film. Enjoy. Oh and a cooler set can be found on the other half's blog.

The first film I ever saw. I had nightmares for weeks and wasn't allowed to go to the cinema again until Oliver came out. I still can't watch it but this time because I'll lose what I saw with a child's eye.
Then some oldies. Saturday was Dixon of Dock Green, Doctor Who then the Saturday Movie. Wrapped in a blanket, eating porridge and disappearing into Day of the Triffids, When Worlds Collide, War of the Worlds and these goodies. Remember when they don't do what they said on the box?

Unlike these for the lads. Dinosaurs, eternal life, lovely. And the other one sums up the film beautifully. No little old lady is going to pop in to see a nice film about the history of Pitman unless she thought it included some serious lumbar stretching.

And to balance that some broody men for us ladies. Worryingly they are all armed.

And finally a cool and scary mix.

That's all folks!

What's brewing?

2008-02-27T22:50:00.005Z

So tomorrow I'm off to be interrogated about my play. Don't really know what to expect and having that panicky "will they think I'm a fraud" moment. These are experienced writers I'll be chatting with. They'll know their stuff. Gulp.

Got to sit down and knock the feature treatment into its final shape. It's almost there. Know what's happening when and why. Just got to get the gobbledygook into the Queen's English and kick it out for feedback.

I have two other features bubbling along.

One is past the treatment stage but I've probably been overambitious. It has three main characters instead of one. Though there is a single lead the others aren't really support. Mainly because they are alpha females and don't like second place. However if I succeed in reigning them in it could be interesting.

I'm very fond of this one. All the main characters are over 40. They refuse to become respectable middle aged ladies and instead are after Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll.

The other feature was going along nicely then I started having doubts. It is currently a period Gothic horror though it started out as present day. I'm now wondering whether to go back to that. I do like a good old Byronic hero/villain. Heathcliffe, ahhh. So I suppose its going to be which shows his brooding splendour the best.

I was going to submit this last one to A Pitch in Time but if its going to change so much it will be a bit pointless. I've got a pitch submitted already for my first one so I'll pop this last one aside for a bit while I battle with the other two.

So lots to do.

Earthquake? Where?

2008-02-27T22:16:00.003Z

Well I kind of missed the earthquake last night. I was watching my Life on Mars DVD and heard a wopping wump. However that's usual round here with the gales from the Irish Sea battering the front of my house with abandon and low flying jets using the chimneys for slalom practice. It was only later I realised what it was.

I feel like a missed something. However I've discovered I can live through it vicariously by reading accounts from Dan Owen (will his remote recover) and Adrian Reynold (will fridgehenge be toppled).

Body Counts

2008-02-24T23:26:00.004Z

Just a quick one. Got one entry off to Pitch in Time and another half written. Then I'll move on to finishing my treatment.

Did make some headway. I now know the ending of the film. Usually I know the start and the end but I stuggle with the middle. This time it was the end that proved a sod.

I also had one of those weird conversations. You know the ones writers have. I thought I'd had the ultimate last year when I went around asking "What's funnier, wet boxers or wet Y-fronts." Y-fronts won, hands down.

However I think I topped it this weekend. "I have a low body count so it wants to a drama. Won't it want to be a comedy if I up the body count? A lot?" Yes I went with a high body count. Much more comfortable with it now.

Then I had to work out how to kill all the extra ones. That came to me in the car ride back from Tescos. Don't ask me how. I'm sure it had nothing to do with the kids killing each other in the back seat.

Also I've got my next project decided, thanks to a discussion on Elinor's blog. Wrinkly women unite! The idea's been knocking around since I turned 40 and became one of the invisibles.

So I've done my duty and provided a post. Though not a long one I know. Hope you all got your pitches in too. Only a few days left. Give it a try. Got to stop cos my giant feline is about to walk over the keyboard and butcher it all.

Won Something

2008-02-20T18:40:00.006Z

It's been very eventful since my last blog. I won something. Yes really. I'm still sort of in shock.

I'd entered a county competition for a short play. North Cumbria Scriptwriting Group is going to put on a set of plays at Theatre by the Lakes and offered one of the slots as a prize. Yes I live in Cumbria. Said it was the back of beyond didn't I? Wouldn't swap it though.

The group selected submissions down to three and then the theatre director chose mine.

So my 5min play will be professionally staged in the spring. I then got an email last night for character notes so they can start casting. Eeeek. Haven't had to write those before. At least not for anyone else to read. Had a go. I'm sure they will tell me if the notes are useless.

I also submitted my portfolio for the course I've been on. Got to wait to find out if it was alright.

I'm also cracking away at Draft II of the treatment for my feature. I worked on it with the course and just have to choose between the three endings I can see.

Also realised the deadline for the Cheltenham Screenwriters' Festival competition Pitch in Time is almost upon me. And I want to submit a pitch for the feature. So I'd better get cracking. If you don't try then you're guaranteed to lose.

And then there's the early deadline for BSSC Live Action shorts at the end of March. I've got a couple of shorts I think are ready but I'm letting them sit there a little so I can read with new eyes before submitting. I got through the first round last year. Doesn't mean I'll get that far again this year but lets see.

I'm also reading and checking a synopsis and 3 chapters of a novel for a friend who is about to send it out. She finished a novel AND reworked and rewritten it. So much better than me. My novels get fully planned out then I get distracted. Not a good habit I know. I've got my fingers and toes crossed for her.

So I've got to get some heavy writing done. Paper out. Pencil sharpened.

And I got this from Sheiky

Bring back Clapperboard

2008-02-15T14:48:00.012Z

OK so I'm going a bit off topic today. I've mastered the links so now I'm going to use them. Highlight the word, click on the chain thing, then paste in the URL (the address thingy at the top of the window thingy). Just for those that were stuck like me (hi Shiekspear).

Talking to the other half about modern animation techniques, as you do, we ended up reminising about Clapperboard and Screen Test. OK that's an age giveaway I know.

For those too young to remember there is a bit about them in this and this. But not much. Screen Test was a film quiz show that included a young film-maker's competition. The entries would be shown on the programme. We all thought we stood a chance if only we had a camera. Clapperboard did a lot of behind the scenes stuff. I remember the Bugsy Malone one really clearly.

Anyway we tried to think of a modern equivalent, a film programme for kids. About making them, not just what's new out. The sprogs then gave me a despairing look and pointed me at Popcorn. On satellite and internet. So I had a look.

Sorry folks, still nothing like Clapperboard and Screen Test. More Film insert-year with extra bits. "They don't make kids programmes like in my day." I'll now totter off to get a nice cup of tea and a hobnob.

Postscript: Find some old memories here and here.

Book Meme

2008-02-13T17:21:00.003Z

So it's happened. I've finally been memed. And by Sheikspear no less. What's more I've finally worked out how to insert a link and it to appear the way I want. Lots to learn with the blog lark.

Well the list of useful screenwriting books isn't too hard, I hope. The tricky part will be finding other victims. Hmmmmm.

Right. I've looked along my writing shelves. I suppose I'll list the ones that I read from cover to cover when I got them. Not to many really. Most are used like reference books. I dip in and out when I need inspiration or I'm stuck on a particular issue. I've also stuck to screenwriting or TV ones.

No.1. Alternative Screenwriting by Ken Dancyger & Jeff Rush

This is top of my list in so many ways. Easy to read, inspiring when I get a block. Despite the title it isn't about breaking rules. More explaining them and showing how to twist and recombine them. Lots of examples too.

No.2. Adventures in the Screen Trade by William Goldman

Is this absent from anyone's list? Just to remind you how nuts the industry is.

No. 3. Creating Unforgettable Characters by Linda Seger

My characters used to just free-wheel. This meant the plot got forgotten completely. This book helped me knock them into shape and to get into their head a bit better.

No.4 and 5. Screenwriting by Lew Hunter and Story by Robert McKee

The nuts and bolts. I don't follow them religiously, instead I use them as problem solvers.

Then the fun ones.

No.6. Porridge: The Scripts by Dick Clements & Ian La Frenais
No.7. Steptoe and Son by Ray Galton & Alan Simpson
No.8. BlackAdder 1485-1917 by Richard Curtis & Ben Elton
No.9 Withnail and I Screenplay by Bruce Robinson
No.10. Smoking in Bed by Bruce Robinson

So how many was I supposed to list? I'm going to stop now or I will end up logging every writing or script book I own!

So who do I meme in turn? Well I pick Jon and Paul and Colin. Unless someone beat me to it.

Doooomed!

2008-02-09T00:50:00.001Z

I'm still counting this as Friday because I've not slept yet. That makes this as a weekly blog.

It has been a busy week juggling hats. There's the hard hat for my daytime job of analysing, mentoring, pointing out the bloody obvious, shouting, screaming and breathing fire. Then there's the knitted teacosy hat for the nurturing wife and mother bit. The trilby for the checking procedure for the village school bit. Lastly the floppy felt beret for the writing bit.

I've managed to keep all in the air this week but I'm really not sure how. Maybe that I'm writing this at gone 1am is a clue. (The time bit at the bottom insists its staying an hour behind me. Sod it.)

So the course went really well and we had a go at directing each others work too. I think I managed to ignore the camera when I was in front of it but it's like....

Don't look at that spider behind you!

There, bet you looked. Just in case. After all how do you know I'm not a cyberpunk construct watching you from within the machine. Sorry, rambling a bit.

Anyway my last bit of homework is nearly done for them to assess next week. However I have been a bit silly. We had to set our plan for after the course and hand it in last week. So what did this airhead put?

What will I have done in :-
1 week : Treatment
2 weeks: Step Plan
1 month: Screenplay

This is for a feature. I'm doooomed. And I did it to myself.

So I'm counting the end of the course as next weekend. That gives me one extra week. Will I make it? Stay tuned folks.

Revenge is lucrative

2008-02-01T22:12:00.000Z

Well I'm at the end of the week and I've done my homework. It was so much harder than I thought but its Done, Done, Done. Until I have to re-write of course.

Did I get any other writing done this week? Well a quick horror short because the idea was there. More notes on my feature. Gunned down a few characters, moved others up to the front line. And it isn't even a war film.

What I am now wondering is if my black comedy is a comedy at all. As it rips apart and reforms it is starting to look like a drama. There again whenever I try to write a drama I end up with comedy anyway.

Can't take anything seriously. Even did a string of jokes in my eulogy at my Dad's funeral a few years back. Dad the rebel would have approved. Funeral director certainly did. A few blue rinses looked shocked though. Haven't they heard of graveside humour?

Anyway I'll just let the characters decide for me.

And that's my weekend planned, more listening attentively at the weekend and tapping away in the evenings.

So if your boss has treated you like you're braindead, your colleagues nicked all the chocolate biscuits and your clients complained because you didn't do 2 weeks work, jump backwards in time and deliver it the day before they realised they needed it then GET REVENGE.

Write a good gorefest story where they all die a horrible death and you will feel so much better. Call it practice and there will be no guilt at all. And you never know, I sold a short story once just letting off steam.

Have a relaxing, revenge filled weekend

Slogging Away

2008-01-29T21:22:00.000Z

So I'm still working away on my lead character, Alex.

Finding contrasts in his character are easy. Naive but highly educated. Cowardly but brave. A dreamer but a realist. And lots more. It helps because he's a bit unstable anyway so you are soon on a roll.

The hard part is identifying the theme. You've really got to dig into your story and cut out all the superficial stuff. I suppose if I really had a handle on it the theme would jump out at me. So I'm tackling it by negating the negation.

I'm finding what I think is the theme, then what is the positive of it, the negative, in between and the absolute extreme worse (NotN). I then look to see if these are in the story. I keep on doing it until I'm sure I've pinned it down.

Our tutor, Karen Bird, has chucked lots of good examples at us. I've given one of them here. If the theme is letting go then the positive is letting go of someone (of course), the negative is holding on, the intermediate is the relationship and the NotN is for someone to be taken away.

So it is the NotN that makes it a really satisfying story. I had a go at applying it below. Harder than I thought to write one rather than check one. Option A only uses three of the four. Option B uses the lot. Which do you prefer?

Sally has a teenage daughter, May. May wants to go out with her friends in the evenings but Sally is scared she will get hurt. It's a bad world out there. So she makes her come home straight from college and she is not allowed out on her own.

Option A
May sneaks out at night and goes drinking with her friends. Sally discovers her out of her head one morning. She forces her to rehab. Finally,with Sally's support, May is clean and ready to start a new life. But it needs Sally to trust her and let her live it. Sally is scared it will all happen again but realises she has to trust May and so lets her go.

Option B
May sneaks out at night and encounters a pusher. She never makes it home. Sally has to search long and hard but finds her on the streets prostituting to feed her habit. She gets May out and supports her recovery from the drugs and psychological damage. Finally May is clean and ready to start a new life. But it needs Sally to trust her and let her live it. Sally is scared it will all happen again but realises she has to trust May and so lets her go.

Both read like TV movies but I'd rather watch B than A. Sally isn't just struggling to keep May, she has her taken away and has to find her. Sally and May have been pushed to the limit. And that final act of trust puts more at risk in B than A.

Of course I may not have applied it all correctly because it's my first go. Still I'm going to master it if it kills me.

Negating the Negation

2008-01-27T17:58:00.001Z

I've spent the weekend on the first part of a script development course. Really useful and, like any good course, you come away with lots of energy. Must the be the buzz of having a bunch of creative people crammed into one room.

Hope that energy will get me through my homework on negating the negation . Sounds scarier than it is, honest it really does. Of course that might just be because I'm deluding myself and don't understand it at all. Well you'll know after next weekend. If I'm right then I'll put an example up. If I've got it wrong then I'll collapse in a cringing mess and write nothing.

Also got to work on my protagonist's emotional tears, that's in rips not a blubbering mess. There again that's what I might end up after attempting it. All because I'm confident and insecure too. There you go, a tear.

Back to Bashing the Killer Keyboard.

The beginning

2008-01-25T21:44:00.001Z

So I've finally done it. I've stopped lurking around other blogs and started my own. Don't know if it will last but lets see.

Problem is these places are as addictive as chocolate. Innocent lurkers watch out, they draw you in. Soon you'll be so busy reading you won't be writing anymore. And then you have to have a go to.

Run! While you can!

Still here? OK. A bit about me. I've been writing for a couple of years with mixed success. As in from "Very funny but not what we're looking for at the moment" to deafening silence. But I dust myself down and keep at it.

And just for an extra challenge I do it all while living in the middle of nowhere! Wouldn 't be fun if it was easy.

Well if this all goes pearshaped I shall blame it on the infamous Lucy who's made us all sign up if we want to keep making comments on her blog. Hi Lucy.